Search Results

Bernie Cooper It is hard to slot Khunying Chamnongsri Hanchanlash for she revels in being different. And to assign her a specific role would be an injustice to someone with such varied talents. Bernie Cooper , the interviewer, finds himself in deep water as the Khunying leads him away from the constraints of a formulated interview An interview with writer Chamnongsri Hanchanlash may quickly flower into a conversation. Her answers to the formulated questions open doors to new ideas which are impossible to pass over without comments or questions of your own, and in no time, the interviewer finds him or herself in deep water. I used the term advisedly, for, as Khunying Chamnongsri remarked, “I’m a water person.” It was not a triumphant declaration of faith or an indication of virtue, but said with a self-deprecating laugh. This preference for avoiding self-assertiveness is characteristic of her work and her personality. It is no doubt, rooted in her childhood as a well-brought up young Thai, and reinforced by her schooldays in a select boarding school in southern England – the pre-Beatles England whose capital city had yet to become known as ‘Swinging’ London. In her work, she successfully fuses expressions of the water-based civilization of Thailand with the nature poetry of England in a way, which transcends cultural and historical considerations. In his introduction to her first book of verse, On An Empty White Page, author and critic Chetana Nagavajara writes, ‘One can no longer think of East and West, Thai or English. This is just poetry.’ Khunying Chamnongsri introduced the water topic by comparing two recent movies, Titanic , and Nang Nak which commanded even bigger audiences in Thailand than the Oscar winning blockbuster. “Water was such an important element in the Thai film,” she said. “Thailand was a land of khlongs in those days, and it reminded me of when I was young near our family house in Thonburi where everything was connected by or with water, and I was always conscious of its changing reflections and movements and moods.” The film analogy illustrates an important Thai/Western cultural divide: In Titanic the water is the sea, a vast and uncontrollable element destroying man’s aspirations. Europe’s coastal-dwellers built dykes and walls to keep it out, in contrast to the Southeast Asian water civilization in which people built houses, which could be quickly dismantled and moved to accommodate the annual floods that were an essential part of life. Water was the element in which they lived; it was respected but not feared. When she was scarcely three years old, Chamnongsri and her father suffered a grievous loss with the death of her mother. The little girl spent much time on her own, playing beside the khlong and under the trees and observing the minute life around her. These close encounters with nature, both in Thonburi and at her grandmother’s house in Hua Hin, were decisive in her development, and led inevitably to writing, framing them in words which she could communicate to others. Her first memories of her grandmother’s reading of Thai classical verses and episodes from King Rama I’s version of the Ramayana to her as a young child, even before she started to read herself, must have implanted the sound of rhythmic, dramatic narratives. Then, when she was twelve, her father decided that she should go to a small private school in England recommended by the Beattie family, his (own) father’s partners in the founding of Loxley , then known as Loxley Rice Co., Ltd . Fritham House was the manor house of a village in the New Forest , whose proprietor was Sir Timothy Eden , elder brother to Sir Anthony , then Prime Minister of the United Kingdom . It was an ideal setting for a sensitive young Thai who had a deep appreciation of nature. "There was so much water there,” said Khunying Chamnongsri. “I used to put on my Wellington boots and go tramping through the marshes and wetlands,” In time, she also fell in love – with the Romantic poets, Byron, Keats and Shelley . No surprise there, perhaps; prolific writers on love and nature, traveling, taking up causes, Byron joining the Greek freedom fighters, Keats and Shelley dying while still in their 20s, their lives as well as their verse compel us to marvel. What may be more surprising was the young Chamnongsri’s enjoyment of the supreme classic stylists Addison and Steels , who lived a century before the Romantics; but they, too, were rebellious frivolous decoration and moral cynicism of their time, and their influence had its effect on the young writer. Dedicated craftsmanship allied with a reserved and thoughtful temperament does not make for impressioned outbursts and slogans, and the social concern in Khunying Chamnongsri’s writing could never be expressed in black and white terms or painted in primary colours. But first, she had to deal with her return to Thailand at the age of 18, and work at the Bangkok Post ’s evening paper, the Bangkok World , where she was a social columnist and, later, editor of the women’s page. “It was fun,” she agreed, “but I wasn’t used to writing to deadlines. I still find they’re a pressure on me.” With immaculate timing, the phone rang, and a magazine editor politely reminded Khunying Chamnongsri that her current feature article was a little overdue. To be able write for a specific purpose in a given time is a useful talent, but it’s not the poet’s cup of tea. “When I write a line, I never know where it’s going to lead me or what I’m aiming, “It always seems to take me somewhere I want to go, and I often realize afterwards that I didn’t know I’d had that idea in me at all.” When she was 22, Chamnongsri married Thailand’s leading ophthalmologist Uthai Rutnin, and became an active supporter of his work. Together they founded the Rutnin Eye Hospita l now in Soi Asoke, which for decades has served the Royal Family and treated patients referred by Royal charity organisations. Khunying Chamnongsri’s active social concern has run parallel to her writing career. “I have always had a tendency to be affected by events I read in the paper, and touched by accounts of abused children and girls forced or tricked into prostitution,” she said, and in 1994 she founded Harbour House in Chiang Rai. In a remote area near the Golden Triangle, the Foundation is a refuge and a training centre for girls at risk from drug abuse and prostitution. Patterns of violence and abuse are often interlinked, and more recently, while continuing as chairperson of Harbour House Foundation , Khunying Chamnongsri has extended her attention to the frequently concealed problem of violence in the home. As an adviser to the Criminal Law Institute Foundation , she has developed projects to understanding and rehabilitating offenders as well as the victims of violence. “Through our Centre to End Domestic Violence Against Women, I’ve had personal knowledge of many domestic abuse cases,” she said. “Most offenders suffered abuse themselves as children, and there is a need for alternative penalties and methods of treatment for them.” She also supported “Gentlemen’s Hotline” a revolutionary step taken by Hotline Foundation with the idea of setting up a help line for men with violent tendencies and other problems. Beside her own private donation. The Rutnin Gimbel Laser Refractive Surgery Center of which she chairs the board of directors, contributed an initial sum followed by Baht 300 per surgery patient. “Many people doubted if it would work because men wouldn’t want to discuss personal problems,” said Khunying Chamnongsri. “They said there would probably be a lot of dirty calls, and of course, there are some. But the surprising thing was that when the news about Gentlemen’s Hotline went out, the hotline received an influx of serious calls from men with problems. Hotline Foundation is now compiling a book of selected case histories – completely anonymous, needless to say – so that other men may be encouraged, families may feel more hopeful and the public generally will become more aware of the problem.” But, says Khunying Chamnongsri, “At my age, I’m happy to have other people do the implementing. There are many people and organisations in the social field more experienced than I am. I see my role as contributing ideas, initiating projects and do what I can to support their activities and initiatives.” She laughed away protests to her suggestion that age was against her. “I am happy with both the main plus and the main minus of being my age,” she declared. “The minus is, you’re not here for much longer; the plus is that you’ve been here for so long!” Easy enough, perhaps, for someone in good shape and who has a young appearance and manner. “I forget things a lot,” she admits. “ But that has pluses, too. It’s the small things I forget, and that leaves my mind clear to receive new things.” Articulating the thought at once produced a water image. “When you’re young, it’s like navigating a small boat on a fast, twisting stream. You’re concentrating on what’s in front of you, and you’re so busy steering you don’t have time to see the whole picture. When you’re older, you’re on a placid lake and you can see the shore and the horizon.” That does not equate to a slow-paced life. Only last year, Khunying Chamnongsri published the book which put her on Thailand’s best-seller list, a chronicle of the Wanglee family, her mother’s forebears who migrated to Thailand from Southern China. It bears a water title: Boats in Mid-Ocean . It would have to, because this flux of change and continuity which water represents is always present in Khunying Chamnongsri’s life and work. The name of her house in Chiang Mai , Nam Saan , can be rendered into English as, ‘woven in water’ , and her three daughters all have names which come from water: Nam-peung, Nam-waan and Nam-oy. Today, married to the eminent development specialist and businessman, Dr. JingJai Hanchanlash and a grandmother of six, Khunying Chamnongsri still declines to conform to the requirements of age. Her creativity still at its height, she smiles a lot, talks a lot, and listens well, too. Her face is youthful, the features mobile; her movements are quick and decisive. Like the river, she has a long, long way to go before reaching the sea. From : "Written in Water" , By Bernie Cooper in Face to Face , Expression . February -March, 2001.

Krittiya Wongtavavimarn A man-made pond with its emerald green water and a small isle sits in the midst of the forest. Standing tall, alone and aloof, there is a coconut tree – planted years ago by an elderly monk. The pond is called Nalikay, a name taken from an age-old lullaby known among people in the South: Dear little one, There’s the Nalikay coconut tree, Growing alone in the sea of wax, Neither touched by rain, Nor reached by thunder, There in the middle of the sea of wax, Attainable only by the one who’s free. Khunying Chamnongsri Rutnin Hanchanlash may humbly say she is still far from being like that coconut tree in terms of acquiring a completely liberated, carefree mind. But read her books, or if possible take a closer look at the author herself, a lively yet serene person, and you may see some of that tree-like stillness. At 66, Khunying Chamnongsri has her hands in both the secular and spiritual worlds – and finds a peaceful balance in both. The chairperson of the Rutnin Eye Hospital also writes a dharma and lifestyle column in the monthly Health and Cuisine magazine. She compiled a collection of her articles in a book titled Vicha Tua Bao (The Art of Living Lightly), which became an instant bestseller and has already gone through several reprints. So have Thai readers embraced another book of hers, one that chronicles the Khunying’s take on spirituality? The latest reprint of Fon Tok Yang Tong, Fah Rong Yang Theung (Touched by Rain, Reached by Thunder) is also auspiciously timed. Khunying Chamnongsri’s spiritual mentor is the late Buddhadasa Bhikkhu , a reformist monk and founder of Suan Mokkh forest monastery, and this year marks the centenary of his birth. Written in lyrical prose, Fon Tok Yang Tong, Fah Rong Yang Theung is a collection of Khunying Chamnongsri’s journals during her solitary practice at Suan Mokkh about 16 years ago. The title plays on the well-known contemplating her materially ample life, dealing with life’s ups and downs, attachment and sorrow – and ends with her eventual realization of the true essence of nature and meaning of life. The Nalikay coconut tree represents nirvana, which is always inside us waiting to be realized.” explains Khunying Chamnongsri. The sea of wax (mentioned in the song) refers to human emotions and thought, which are so transient, changeable and which depend on stimuli, much like the wax that becomes soft or hard depending on the temperature. “The one who’s ‘free’ describes a person who has transcended attachments to worldly desires. Such a person will be like the coconut tree that continues to stand firm and alone, regardless of the rain or thunder.” Over a decade ago, despite all the material abundance around her, the Khunying became dissatisfied and disillusioned with her life, feeling it was “impermanent, troublesome and illusory.” Striving to erase the nagging, individualistic and selfish urges, she sought refuge in spiritual practice, which ultimately led her to Buddhadasa and Suan Mokkh. “Up until then, I never really cared much about religion. Actually, I used to sneer at it, thinking it was all about blind faith and a waste of time. What I saw in the mirror was a professional working woman, ambitious, driven, that sort of ‘I’m good; I’m smart; I’m a pro’, image. "I thought I knew myself, but I was totally wrong. When I became anguished, nothing could heal my soul. Splurging or hanging out with friends might cheer me up, but only for a while. I couldn’t guard my own thoughts. I couldn’t get rid of the depression and fear.” At Suan Mokkh, under the guidance of Buddhadasa’s assistant, Acharn Runjuan Indrakamhaeng , Khunying Chamnongsri had her first lessons in Vipassana (Insight) meditation – how the mind works and how to control and understand it. “Through meditation, I came to a realization that the very source of dukkha (suffering) is rooted in our own heart. And the only way to put out the burning fire inside is to douse the ego, our constant desire to only think of ourselves. “At Suan Mokkh, I’ve come to realise the true meaning of education. I found meditation is a path of discipline – but less to satisfy the intellect than to seek a balance between sati (awareness of the present) and samathi (concentration of the tranquil mind),” she added. Her book, Fon Tok Yang Tong , is full of insights gleaned from natural phenomena. Khunying Chamnongsri said Buddhadasa always stressed that it was best to learn in nature itself. When the venerable monk was still alive, every day, at 5 am. Members of the forest monastery would come to his kuti (abode), to listen to his dharma talks about the perennial cycle of samsara. In the background, a cacophony of nature – the roosters’ crows, dogs’ barking and so on – was clearly at play. "Than Acharn (Buddhadasa) often said how the notions of ‘I’ and ‘mine’ are the real culprits of our suffering. By observing the various lives at Suan Mokkh, how the different creatures live and die, I learned to observe the nature of my own mind. I realised how thoughts and emotions are, like everything else, always in a state of perpetual flux.” But meditation is not an escape from the world, nor past sufferings, Khunying Chamnongsri emphasised. Rather, inner peace and a sense of harmony comes when one is aware of and yet accepts suffering. For only then, “can you seek a way out of it”, she said. In retrospect, Fon Tok Yang Tong is an ironic, happy twist to a deliberate violation of the master’s words. During a three-month retreat at Suan Mokkh, Khunying Chamnongsri was asked to refrain from all communication with the outside world. This was done in order to minimize any outside influences that might hinder her dharma practice. “There was to be no phone, computer, radio or television. I was not supposed to read, write, or even speak to anyone. Acharn Runjuan said cultivation of awareness can come only when the mind is cleansed of all thoughts, but I found it really difficult to fulfill this.” So Khunying Chamnongsri started to “talk” to the white, empty pages in her diary. The journal entries, which later became Fon Tok Yang Tong, was a byproduct of the part of her mind that still clung to attachments and memories. “Writing is a means of expression of thoughts, but thoughts are products of the past.” She noted. “When I wrote the diary, yes it was a monologue with the T on the stage and the empty pages as the audience. So when I wrote, I still attached myself to the past, and ended up a victim of my own (and old) beliefs, thoughts, my upbringing, past experiences. In a way, the act of writing is like stirring up the old silts, leading my mind to re-register the pains, not letting them go. Thus writing could create an inner conflict that continued to eat at me on the inside.” By the third month of her intensive retreat, Khunying Chamnongsri stopped writing altogether. But Fon Tok Yang Tong went on to have its own life – and merits. In her afterword, the author recalled a meeting with Buddhadasa Bhikkhu not long before his final departure. The venerable monk told her he had read the book and found it was very well-written. For Khunying Chamnongsri, writing offers an honest, refreshing look at the transitory but ever unfolding nature of life. Such is the case in chapter on sweeping leaves, “I saw leaves fall onto the ground every day I swept them away and the next day there would be more lying on the ground. Everything in life is impermanent, very few things last forever. “The point of this is that if we can enjoy everything without attachment, we’ll be free of the sorrow when it comes to an end. Such is how we should live.” she said. Khunying Chamnongsri‘s journey ' inwards' has been a long and arduous one. She has documented it in her book Vicha Tua Bao , which embraces a range of practical dharma tips for everyday use, and gives sensible and realistic advice for living happily, peacefully and harmoniously in society as we know it. “It’s a fun book of my own views of life and the experiences of others with whom I came in contact with. I find life such a rich material for writing and for discovery.” she said. " I did not intend to write about dharma. Rather, it’s about my discoveries and ways of looking at things. It is just natural that humour and fun are a part of the fabric and, I suppose, of the dharma too.” The value of dharma books aside, Khunying Chamnongsri said they cannot compare with the actual practice. “Like a scientist, a true practitioner needs to do the ‘experiment’ him – or herself, to explore the nature of the mind first-hand.” “Normally, we are too busy to see our real selves and to observe our own minds. But think of swimming: You have to keep practicing to improve your strokes and stamina so that if and when you find yourself in stormy waters, you will not drown.” As modest as always, the veteran writer said she herself is still swimming in the ' sea of wax' as well. “Sometimes, I am still affected by the notion of ‘what’s next?’ It’s like, to take a line from Emily Dickinson’s poem (If You Were Coming in The Fall) a goblin bee that will not state its sting.” “I’m still affected by the rain and thunder, though I’ve learned to observe my reactions and responses to the rain and thunder around me.” “There are certainly bound to be periods of progress, of regressing, even detours. I have not reached the (state of being like a coconut) tree yet, but I’ll keep on striving toward the goal.” ............................................................................................................... From: In Spirit - A beautiful Mind. by Krittiya Wongtavavimarn Photo by Somkid Chaijitvanit In Outlook, Bangkok Post , March 26, 2006.

Khunying Chamnongsri Hanchanlash By Nilibol Phanichkarn Life is a formidable force. Like a relentless river cutting deep into mountains to form breathtaking gorges, life’s experiences leave eternal imprints on our hearts and minds. In a heart–to–heart with Thailand Tatler , Khunying Chamnongsri Hanchanlash , one of Thailand’s prominent authors, talks about the fundamental forces of life and the experiences which have enriched her literary work. For Khunying Chamnongsri , better known in literary circles as Chamnongsri Rutnin , the overwhelming success of Thailand’s latest best seller, Duj Nava Klang Mahasamut (Like A Boat in Mid-Ocean) , a riveting biography of the Wanglee family, takes her to new heights. This cultivates increasing popularity for the inspirational works in her name, be it On A White Empty Page , her first collection of poems and tales in English which is now being reprinted. The Wind Crab , a children’s story in English and Thai as well as other works in Thai. But like the plays and stories told by Khunying Chamnongsri, life has not been all a bed of roses for her. Khunying Chamnongsri was born to an established banking family, the Lamsams , a well-respected and influential dynasty that has made its mark in Thai history. Yet somehow, “happiness” was elusive. For a child under three years old, life dealt a cruel blow with the death of her mother, barely leaving her a chance to know of motherly love and warmth of the forge a bond with the one who gave her life. Khunying Chamnongsri (or “Sri” as she calls herself) remembers a childhood characterized by a sense of “aloneness” . Solitude became a constant companion to the dreamy child. In nature and books, she found fascinating worlds waiting to be explored. “There was no TV back then. I used to wonder what having a mother was like. Being a very bad student made matters worse. It contributed to a feeling of isolation.” She continues, “Our house was on the middle of an orchard in Thonburi, with lots of trees and water. I loved to read under pomelo trees and watch big red ants frantically scurrying along the branches. And there were those translucent little ‘needle’ fish, pla kem, always skimming the surface of the klong…” Circumstances sharpened her senses. Sri developed a keen eye for details, taking meticulous note of everything around her. This extraordinary power of observation makes her work really come alive. Khunying Chamnongsri wrote: “The Wind Crab grew out of my childhood memories of Hua Hin. I was a lonely child by nature, and that was probably why I had time to see things in minute details – the waves, the sky, the sand, and all the living and non-living things. I remember solitary afternoon watching changing light and colours – the changes were fascinatingly continuous in everything, especially the sea.” Fate wasted no time in teaching the little girl about the inescapable truth that nothing in life is permanent. “All the time, you could see lots of little deaths: of ants, dogs, fish, trees.” This awareness of impermanence, the transient nature of life and the inevitability of change became an important influence in Sri ’s thinking. At the age of 12, Sri went to England. Of her father’s decision to send her overseas, she explains, “Perhaps he wasn’t quite sure what to do with us girls growing up without a mother. He wanted the best for us. “ At school in romantic New Forest in southern England, she started to write. English became her emotional language while Thai was the intellectual one. “Now it’s become more balanced.” Sri is at ease thinking and writing in both languages but rarely translates her own work from one to the other though she is also recognized for her translations of Thai literature into English. Back from England at 18, she did a brief stint at Loxley Co, Ltd before joining the English language morning paper, the Bangkok World , as reporter/columnist, and was soon promoted to editor of the women’s and social page. There she remained until her marriage at 22 to ophthalmologist, Uthai Rutnin , who later became ophthalmologist to His Majesty the King . She helped him found the famous Rutnin Eye Hospital on Soi Asoke. For more than a decade, raising four children and hospital commitments kept her from writing. Khunying Chamnongsri has gained widespread recognition for a wide range of literary output, yet she does not consider herself a poet or a professional writer. Her explanation for this bizarre notion: “I don’t write regularly, I rarely choose the forms or the subjects or the language. You can say they choose me and that’s why my work comes out as plays, stories, poetry, articles, and now, pseudo-biographies. Unable to write at will or at long stretches. I need to take little breaks to do some cooking or gardening or whatever. In short, I don’t feel professional.” For Sri , each poem she pens is a little journey from the first line to the last line – a journey of discovery. “You start out writing without the consciousness that it is poetry. You suddenly feel a line, you write it down, other lines follow. But they aren’t just words – but thoughts, feelings, texture and the rhythm of things lead you on and on to the final line which usually surprises you and you say to yourself: I never knew that this was inside me." “Poetry is a journey inward. You discover things on every little journey … I get to know myself in ways I never thought I would.” Sri pauses. “And in getting to know oneself, one somehow gets the feel of other people too. People – each of us – in the depths beyond action, stripped of sophistication, we’re not so very different.” Her work The Raindrop and the Lotus Leaf was originally written in English and later translated into Thai by Tepsiri Sooksopa and set to Western orchestral music by composer Dnu Huntrakul . It was performed by a 16-piece chamber orchestra to full-house audiences. It is still available in cassette form. Though many were enchanted by its beauty and ‘sensuousness’ . Khunying Chamnongsri points out that the work is based on the Buddhist concept of transience. With hindsight, she came to realize how intensely she had become aware of the impermanence of all things and this was even before her ventures into Buddhist meditation. Like many others. Khunying Chamnongsri used to regard Buddhism as a religion inseparably linked to rites, beliefs and superstitions and was an outspoken skeptic. At the age of 36, her 60-year-old mother-in-law ignited her curiosity about Buddhist teachings. She became intrigued and embarked upon a study of Buddhism albeit somewhat intellectually – an experience she likened to “studying the theory without spending time in the lab." What you know is what you hear or think you understand. There is no direct awareness. Driven by curiosity, she spent three days in a meditation retreat but, with young children, she passed by the chance of further “lab” experiences. Finally, she went for the 'real thing' . During a period of unhappiness, she spent three full months in meditation retreat at the remote Suan Mok Forest Monastery at a time when the famous philosopher monk. Buddhadassa was still alive and teaching. She went in search of an answer. Why was it that in spite of the wealth, health, recognition, relatives and friends, intelligence and endless opportunities for enjoyment, she was not able to conquer the unhappiness and the endless cycle of thoughts that caused it. More than 15 years had passed since her first true encounter with Buddhism – she once again resorted to intense soul-searching (which she calls “introspective exploration” .) Traveling, entertainment, friendship, rationalization could only camouflage or at best alleviate unhappiness but not uproot or transcend it. At Suan Mok , surrounded by nature, she came to realize that as human beings we’re all part of nature – “no more, no less significant than the plant and animal lives around you. Once your breath stops, you become a past, a memory. You’re not all that indispensable so why the fuss? As your self-importance diminishes so do your unhappiness and fears. This brings you to the understanding of unhappiness and its cause within yourself. And once you understand unhappiness, you understand happiness, too.” She came to accept that life is impermanent. “It is transient in a way that each moment comes and goes without returning so you better make each one as bright and sparkling as possible.” Khunying Chamnongsri also made another astonishing discovery. “When you cut yourself almost completely from people for a length of time, you feel a tremendous urge to communicate. You suddenly realize that communication is a need.” She could not resist the urge to write down her thoughts and observations. Then as her mind became still, the urge faded. The writing, however, became a book of reflective poetry in Thai: Fon Tok Yung Tong Fah Rong Yung Tueng (Touched by Rain, Reached By Thunder). At Suan Mok , the seeds for Orange Eight Legs were also planted. One day she found a tiny little spider. “It was orange. So orange…and bright like the sun shining through the winter mist. It had little black legs like threads, almost invisible. You had to get up very close. And the webs so thin and very intricate – it caught the sunlight and shone like diamond threads. You could pass by without seeing it at all.” Years later, the captivating little spider became the hero of her new children’s story in Thai and English. Orange Eight Legs , which is being illustrated in silk ikat by textile artist Samut Koomsuwan and soon to be on sale. The first of her two plays. When Dusk Ends , won the John A. Eakin literary prize in 1981, but Sri refuses to see herself as a playwright. “I know nothing about stagecraft. The subject came as a dialogue and I simply set it down as if I am seeing it on stage. It’s better for reading than for performing, I think.” Her second play, Kaewta’s Horization , deals with a mother-daughter relationship during the mentally-retarded daughter's sexual awakening. “I put myself into the characters and suddenly discover that I can be all of them. There is no complete villain and no complete hero. Just like in Greek mythology, the Gods have weaknesses, greed and cruelty … but we tend to overlook these (negative traits in ourselves).” There is hardly a dull moment in Khunying Chamnongsri ’s life. She is constantly on the move. In business, she is chairperson of the Rutnin Eye Hospita l and of L.Wave Company Ltd. a video production house that produces video presentations and programmes for public television and is run by her daughter, Varadda Lee-arporn . With a flair for adventure, three years ago, in her roles as chairman. Khunying Chamnongsri accepted the task of writing a script for a United Nations Development Program (UNDP) promotional video on the Tumen River Economic Development Area (TREDA) . The zone extends across territory under the jurisdictions of Russia , China and North Korea . The focus of the video presentation being on the North Korean part of the F ree Economic Zone , she had to fly to Beijing then onto Pyongyang where she boarded a train and traveled for another 23 hours northwards to the twin ports of Rajin-Songbong where the borders of the three countries converge at Tumen River estuary. “We didn’t get off the train at all until we reached Rajin-Songbong. The same on the way back. We spent three nights conducting our survey there. It’s beautiful virgin area, utterly unspoiled forest lakes and ocean. It was so exciting – I suspect I know what Columbus must have felt! We had to work with North Korean officials and the representative of the United Nations Tumen River Basin Commission in Beijing.” The video was made in six languages and shown the UNDP to investors all over the world. "These days you can get Rajin-Songbong a car over the Chinese border – a much easy journey.” says Khunying And when it comes to family, she is a supportive mother and sets aside time to be with her four children and three grandchildren. Her recent marriage to business executive and international development specialist, Dr.Jingjai Hanchanlash , with whom she shares many common interests, has helped her to develop new dimensions in her work in social development. In spite of business, social and family commitments and the many demands on her time, she remains inextricably involved in the social development projects she personally champions. A genuine desire to help adolescent girls from impoverished rural families fuels her commitment to ensure a future for these children. She has devoted her efforts to the prevention of child prostitution and drug abuse through the establishment of the Harbour House Foundation , a shelter for northern adolescent girls at risk of being drawn into child prostitution and the drug trade. She also plays an active part as an advisor to the Foundation for Children (FFC) Publishing House. It was through Tepsiri Sooksopa , a children’s story writer and illustrator, that she initially became involved in the Foundation for Children Publishing House . As advisor, Khunying Chamnongsri suggested the use of the diaries which the foundation publishes annually and distributes to rural areas around the country as a vehicle through which underprivileged children in rural communities would have an opportunity to see the works of art by Thailand’s top artists. This would be through illustrations of children’s stories. The publishers initially doubted that this could be. Khunying Chamnongsri , unable to resist the challenge went ahead. She approached the first of these famous Thai artists, Thaiwijit Puangkasemsomboon , to discuss the possibility of illustrating one of her stories. The outcome was a beautifully illustrated book: The Wind Crab . Today it is available in English, Thai and Japanese. Artists such as Paretas Hutangkura were soon illustrating Children Foundation yearly diaries featuring tales by various writers including Khunying Chamnongsri ’s The Sunray and the Gray Stone in 1977 with vivid illustrations by Niti Wattaya. In a brief introduction to this story, Professor Prawase Wasi conveys a poignant message. For him this simple tale about innocent love between the sun’s ray and a grey stone lying on the bank of a muddy klong was of great significance to the children’s foundation. Like the small grey stone that caught the warm ray of the sun and took on her light so the stone glittered in the sun and glowed with warmth, so it is with children who are delinquents, underprivileged and abused. If they are touched by the warm rays of love and compassion and they see some light, no matter where they fall, or no matter how dark a place might be, they will retain this positive emotional experience and could give out warmth and love. Denied of this, they will remain 'a cold grey stone' . As her involvement in the well-being of underprivileged children intensifies, this has given her infinite resolve and strength. Located 13 Kilometers from the Golden Triangle , the Harbour House Foundation takes on teenagers and sees them through a highly vulnerable transition period just as they complete their compulsory educational curriculum and are at a critical turning point in their lives. At the beginning of their teens, they are not quite grown up and are still lacking maturity to retain a full-time job. The foundation houses feeds and educates them up to Matayom 3 . The girls also receive basic vocational training skills such as typing, sewing, cooking, growing vegetables and raising chicken. “The foundation is always short of funds, it can only take a limited number of girls. In desperation, I’ve personally set up a company, Shelter (or Rom Ruen) Co, Ltd , in which I legally renounced all rights in favour of the foundation.” says Khunying Chamnongsr i. “The company has just started and is still losing money. Its business is to organize conference services for international meetings of not more than 100 people. We also produce company calendars, desk diaries and printed wedding souvenirs like little notebooks or address books especially designed to suit the couple. I have also started to design or select various silver items for sale – jewellery boxes, handbags – some of which are now on sale at Chiva-Som Health Resort in Hua Hin. We also take orders for sign cloth bags of any design. You see we also help needy housewives make an extra living by sewing these and the children help with sewing handles or buttons – whatever. Yes, we need business from customers.” Her thirst for intellectual challenge is awesome. Interested in the fact that many extremely intelligent and highly skilled individuals have made a mess of their lives and have become non-productive or even destructive, Khunying Chamnongsri is fascinated by the question of emotional intelligence learning. How was it that people became a negative factor to themselves and those around them? This was even more true of the disadvantaged for whom there were fewer alternatives. “Every single person, disadvantaged and not, is a part of our society. Don’t think ‘them’ or ‘me’. Just by accident of birth, you could be ‘them’ and they could be ‘you’. You can’t say that what they do does not affect you. It does. Your security, your economy. The well-being of the country could be affected by the people you call ‘they’. Actually, there is no ‘they’. Just us. It is our responsibility to keep ‘they’ as ‘us’." “What is missing when one’s intellectual learning and skills cannot be used properly in life?” Khunying Chamnongsri believes that ' emotional intelligence and coping skills' can be drawn from our own readiness to discover ourselves. She suggests that we can only truly ' know' through actual experience and awareness, not just by intellect or thought. “Let’s take the simple case of knowing what a pineapple is. Until the moment that a person has actually tasted the fruit, he or she does not actually have a real appreciation for it. Emotional intelligence comes not from intellectual exercise but from actual awareness of the nature of yourself, your emotions and the working of your own thoughts. It also becomes an extension to understanding other people.” Khunying Chamnongsri works with a number of children on developmental activities she calls Awareness. Perception and Attitude (APA) Training. Some children may be without relatives or parents but even they do not exist on their own. Most maintain a level of interaction with the people around them and one day will become wives, mothers and friends to others. She is, therefore, not simply helping a child but “a child who is a part of the society and as such will influence society to a certain extent.” It is what she calls “helping society through every one of these little girls.” In the crescendo of fame and recognition, Khunying Chamnongsri remains true to her protégés. The proceeds from the sale of the book, Duj Nava Klang Mahasamut , goes towards securing a brighter future for the young, underprivileged girls. From: Thailand Tatler , May 1999

Story : Kucharee Tansubhapol Pictures : Yingyong Un-anongrak When it became known last September that well-known writer and businesswoman Khunying Chamnongsri Rutnin , 57, and Loxley executive Dr. Jingjai Hanchanlash , 55, both widowed, planned to marry, Thai society gasped in surprise – and delight. Now, four months after their wedding, the happy couple thee Outlook in their own words how they met, and become for each other “the pieces of the jigsaw that fit together perfectly.” How long did you know each other before marring? Dr. Jingjai : Ten months. During the years when you were a widower I widow, did you think you would marry again? Dr. Jingjai: Not really. I didn’t feel any need to. Khunying Chamnongsri : For me, absolutely not. Why is that? Khunying Chamnongsri: Grandmothers don’t usually remarry, you know – after all, who’d be mad enough to marry a grandmother! Seriously, I was quiet happy being single again with the children grown up. I liked space and independence. Even as a child, I often enjoyed being completely alone – solitude, you call it? Well, now and again I did feel twinges of envy when I saw couples attending functions together – but only very few and very small twinges. I had done serious study of Buddhism and practiced meditation for several years. In fact, I spent weeks, even months taking solitary retreats in forest monasteries. I wanted to continue living a self-sufficient and useful life – ending with a serene old age. A husband wasn’t a part of the scenario! How long was your widowhood? What was it like? Khunying Chamnongsri: Five years. All in all, it was a busy, interesting and challenging period. There was no loneliness. At the time, my oldest daughter was already married and had a son. The other three children then started coming home one by one, got jobs and got married. My children have always been like friends, so our relationship was warm, full of arguments and fun. We could discuss any subject. All the in-laws were so good, too. I had all kinds of interests, and so many different things came up for me to work on. Then, there was the responsibility for the Rutnin Eye Hospital which was not easy, and the responsibility for Harbour House Foundation which shelters, educates and trains young girls aged 12 to 16 to prevent them from being drawn into prostitution, building their self-worth in the process. They are northern girls from families with problem of drug addiction, abuse, broken homes. The work has plenty of difficulties – funding being one of them. There wasn’t much time left for writing which is what I love to do. Dr. Jingjai, a childless widower of your status and qualifications is sure to be popular with ladies. Why did you choose to marry a grandmother when you must have had several other choices? Dr. Jingjai: To start with, I didn’t choose to marry a grandmother. I chose the woman who is very special to me. (Laughs) To use a metaphor befitting Valentine’s Day, I’d say we are like the right pieces of a jigsaw that fit together perfectly. I think there are people who have the versatility and freshness of youth along with the experience and wisdom of age. Chamnongsri is one of them. She has so many talents and unexpected qualities – marrying her is rather like marrying five different women of many different ages. Khunying Chamnongsri: (Laughs) Now we know he is polygamous at heart! Dr. Jingjai: The grandmother is the value added. I have always wanted children. She has given me an instant family – very warm, very lively – four married children and three grandchildren! I had a wonderful time spoiling the kids last weekend when we were all together in Hua Hin. There was a lot love and humour, and no generation gap. I think they all like me. Khunying Chamnongsri: (Laughing) You know very well that you have become a real favorite. They are still laughing about Grandpa Jingjai taking charge of the five-, four-, and two-year-olds, and the dog. Dr. Jingjai, from your own experience, do you think our society allows widowers to have a much better time than widows? Dr. Jingjai: Yes, definitely. As a widower I was free to go back to enjoying a bachelor’s life… had plenty of opportunities to meet and date beautiful, interesting and eligible women. All this, and much more, we could do without being looked upon badly or starting nasty rumours, while it would be quite different for widows and divorced women. Unfair, yes, but that’s the norm of our society. It should be changing though. I think many outdated norms in Thai society are slowing evolving with the inevitable globalization process. What was your life like before you married Khunying Chamnongsri? Dr. Jingjai: (Laughing) Worked hard, played hard. My work as First Senior Vice-President in charge of the international portfolio for Loxley Public Company which is a major Thai conglomerate is quite onerous in itself. I also continued to be very active in international development works and NGO activities. Fortunately, my chairman at Loxley allows me to continue to pursue these activities which I have been doing for 30 years before becoming a businessman. All these things entailed a lot of travelling and meeting with a great variety of people. Then there were close friends and different groups with whom I went out with, dining, drinking – all the usual things. I also played a lot of sports – mainly tennis. And yes, dating – within reason. What was your first impression of Khunying Chamnongsri? How did things lead to marriage? Dr. Jingjai: It began with just a formal introduction in passing. She struck me as very pretty, charming and attractive. Having already heard about her I was very surprised by her youthful looks. It was sometime after that I had an opportunity to help her on a project of the Harbour House Foundation. That was when we really got acquainted. Watching her go about her work, seeing her handling of the girls and her relationship with them, I felt that I would be very happy if I could have spent my whole life with her. In the months that followed we had discussions, arguments and plenty of laughs. We also had daily e-mail conversations because some things conveyed better in writing than in speaking. (Laughing) That’s how I came to relies the depth and perfection of the jigsaw! The decision to remarry was obviously easy for Dr. Jingjai, yet difficult for you. Why? Khunying Chamnongsri: it’s because of my – age not my status nor fear of people’s opinions. Life in my fifties had been the best period of my life – I had intended to go on enjoying my work and my life in my own way. I also wanted to remain free of attachments – being old enough to realize that attachment is like… (laughs) like fly-paper, that sweet sticky paper people used to catch files with in the old days. Besides, there were doubts and uncertainties, the kinds women feel in this situation – I mean, women who are, what you politely call, “elderly” . What made you come to the decision? Khunying Chamnongsri: (Laughs) Jingjai, the person that he is. The completeness of the jigsaw that he has told you about. The feeling of happiness and strength whenever we were together. In short, the fly-paper has caught the fly! It is not usual for a widow to remarry so late in life. Khunying, what was the general reaction of the news that you were going to marry Dr. Jingjai? Khunying Chamnongsri: Mainly surprise, especially from younger people. They expected Jingjai would marry a much younger woman – he was known to be pretty popular. One of the most surprised was my brother, Dhongchai, who was wrongly accused of being the matchmaker. Most of my friends and relatives were happy for me. Some of those who didn’t know him were worried … until they got to know him. My children had no objections – they only asked me to take time to think carefully. Now they are really happy to have him in the family. There were people who thought I was silly and ridiculous. You know, the ingrained idea that remarriage is not respectable for widows who are middle-aged and older, especially grandmothers. How did the disapproval affect you? Khunying Chamnongsri: It is natural for people to have different views. It is interesting, though, that after the story in the Bangkok Post and the social news in Thai Rath, we were flooded with congratulations. Even people who didn’t know us personally sent words that the news cheered them up at a time when the headlines were so depressing. I am not sure whether it is a positive sign of more open-mindedness, or the unusual romance being like a bright spot against a dark background. Both, I’d like to think. What do you think, Dr. Jingjai? Dr. Jingjai: I think times are changing. If older women are healthy, besides being young physically and mentally, why shouldn’t they be respected for making the best of their lives the way they choose. These days, you can find a few 50-year-olds who are more youthful than some 35-year-olds in just about everything but years. I firmly believe that the trend of older women, widowed or single, to marry will increase as one of the changing norms of our society. Do you think love is necessary in marriage? Dr. Jingjai: Yes. It is the essential foundation for a happy and meaningful marriage, especially when it is complete- the physical, the emotional, the intellectual and the spiritual. As this is your Valentine’s edition about us elderly people who dare to get married (laughs), shall we call the love that accumulates between two mature people who complement each other “complete and rational romanticism”? Can marriage survive without love? Dr. Jingjai: Yes, of course, plenty survive. You can see it all around us, only you can’t really tell if the couples manage to keep up what I call a “correct relationship” for social or other reasons. Without love, marriage is just a relationship of responsibility and commitment and, at best, companionship isn’t refreshing; it is dry and cannot give true happiness to either partner. Khunying Chamnongsri: At its worst, it can be cruel, unhappy and dehumanizing. Do you have any expectations from your marriage? Khunying Chamnongsri: I don’t believe in expectations. Jingjai and I agree that we shall try not make demands on one another. Marrying so late, we realize the shortness of our time together. The good thing about this is that each of us tries to give all the happiness we can to the other. If both are the givers, then both automatically are the receivers. There is so much to be gained and no need for demands. We grow to be appreciative of all the positives and tend to overlook the negatives. So far all this has worked well. Of course, being human – we don’t expect our relationship to be anywhere near perfection. But we shall always keep in mind the shortness of time, together with uncertain and transient nature of things – that really give value to our time together and everything that we try to do for one another. We seem to have more energy, more ability to help others when we are a happy team. Jingjai and I also practise Buddhist meditation together whenever we can. It does much to enrich our lives and our relationship. So, where is the need for expectations? And you Dr. Jingjai – any expectations? Dr. Jingjai: I confirm all the Sri said in answer to this question. Like her, I have no expectations because I am fully content with the … what shall I call it … the mellow depth and warmth of the love between u … such contentment I have never before experienced in my life. Maybe it is the privilege of age, or perhaps the reward for some good things I have done, or perhaps it is something only we who are nearing our old age are capable of feeling. The only thing I’d like to add is that I would be very glad if our story proved to be an encouragement to elderly people like us, especially women, that they should be free to find happiness in life should they find someone they love – provided it isn’t immoral, illegal, or irresponsible. This may be one of the constructive contributions we give to our society before we are gone. From: Outlook, Bangkok Post, February 14, 1998

E-mail dose work out for a couple in love Here’s a bit of romance for you, a story of happy endings that brings joy and hope to everyone’s heart on a Monday. When two people get married, no one bats an eyelid: Most people do so at least once in a lifetime. But when those two people happen to be a widow and a widower in their late fifties, it’s something of a rarity among Thais, and therefore tends to cause a stir. The happy pair are Khunying Chamnongsri Rutnin and Dr Jingjai Hanchanlash. Most people know Khunying Chamnongsri as a well-respected poet and translator who has that rare ability to translate Thai verse into English verse keeping the beauty, the meaning and the nuances of both languages intact. She was also an active supporter of the Harbour House Foundation with projects in Chiang Rai province. Unwitting matchmaker (or maybe it wasn’t such an innocent move on his part) was Khunying’s brother Thongchai Lamsam, CEO of Loxley Public Co, Ltd, who introduced her to his first senior vice-president to discuss the company’s involvement in the foundation. Discussions, carried out mostly by e-mail, started off innocently enough, but soon things reached a more personal level and they soon found that they had a lot in common: reading, attending concerts, etc. And soon, love blossomed. They will be celebrating their wedding with a quiet ceremony among family members, by presenting food to monks with Khunying’s four children. Then it’s off to a quiet location, where they can both indulge in their love of nature. “It’s a bit of an irony,” said Khunying Chamnongsri , “as my youngest daughter just got married last year, and now I’m the next bride.” Just goes to show that it’s never too late, and that e-mail relationships do work out. From: Society, Bangkok Post Outlook September 22, 1997

Poet: Believed to have been composed in the early Ayutthaya period (1350-1569 AD), Lilit Phra Lor is a masterpiece Thai tragic romance. It was praised in 1916 by the Literature Society as the best example of ‘lilit’ poetic form เรื่อง ลิลิตพระลอ ได้รับการยกย่อง เป็นวรรณคดีชั้นเยี่ยม ไม่ปรากฏนามผู้แต่ง คาดว่าแต่งขึ้นในสมัยอยุธยาตอนต้น (พ.ศ.1991-2076) Translate: Chamnongsri Rutnin (Hanchanlash) แปล คุณหญิงจำนงศรี รัตนิน (หาญเจนลักษณ์) Illustration : Hem Vejakorn , From Hem Vejakorn Foundation ภาพประกอบ ของ เหม เวชกร จากมูลนิธิเหม เวชกร https://web.facebook.com/HemVejakornFoundation?locale=ms_MY 30 Oh, cousins, about whom are voices raised? In whose praise do all the world sing? Is your sleep so deep you forget to wake? Think, sisters, beg not us to speak. เสียงฦๅเสียงเล่าอ้าง อันใด พี่เอย เสียงย่อมยอยศใคร ทั่วหล้า สองเขือพี่หลับใหล ลืมตื่น ฤๅพี่ สองพี่คิดเองอ้า อย่าได้ถามเผือ ฯ 31 Fret over this no more, dear loves. We ourselves shall think of ways To bring the king to mate with both. Veiled summons shall be sent. สิ่งนี้น้องแก้วอย่า โศกา ณแม่ เผือจักขออาสา จุ่งได้ ฉันใดราชจักมา สมสู่ สองนา จักสื่อสารถึงไท้ หากรู้เปนกล ฯ 32 Wrong thoughts are shameful, cousins, Women beckoning a man to come. Better to die of longing For we love he who knows us not. ความคิดผิดรีตได้ ความอาย พี่เอย หญิงสื่อชักชวนชาย สู่หย้าว เจ็บเผือว่าแหนงตายดีกว่า ไส้นา เผือหากรักท้าวท้าว ไป่รู้จักเผือ ฯ 33 Such thoughts are not wrong, my loves, Wiles woven for love are forever right. We shall go to every witch doctors. And see if the king can resist their charms. ไป่ห่อนเหลือคิดข้า คิดผิด แม่นา คิดสิ่งเปนกลชิด ชอบแท้ มดหมอแห่งใดสิทธิ์ จักสู่ ธแม่ ให้ลอบลองท้าวแล้ อยู่ได้ฉันใด ฯ 34 Inwardly both were pleased outwardly both denied replying that the shame was we great of goodness none if anyone should discover royal daughters would be shamed names dishonoured over in what corner would we hide our faces the two companions understood their princesses ‘ hidden wish ภายในสองนางขอบ ว่ามิชอบภายนอก ดอกห้ามว่าผิดใหญ่ เขือคิดใช่ความดี มีผู้รู้น่ากลัว เสียตัวเขือลูกไท้ จะไว้ผิดในแหล่งหล้า จะไว้หน้าแห่งหนใด ข้าเดาใจสองสบ พบกระแหน่สองศรี ใจกษัตรีย์มีเสียชอบ เราจะประกอบจงควร ซึ่งสองครวญจุ่งได้ ไว้ความร้ายแก่เรานา ข้าก็ว่าสองพงาอยู่เกล้า สองท้าวเจ้าไป่รู้ ไว้เผือผู้อาสา ครานี้พี่บผิด ความคิดสองบได้ สองบพิตรจักไว้ สองพี่เลี้ยงเยียใด ฯ 183 As though dying she wept and beat her breast. Mother’s words repeated over years wasted, Or is your karma misleading you, oh king? Knowing yet not knowing, distraughted and lost. ทาบตีอกไห้พ่าง เมือมรณ์ คำแม่สอนสุดสอน บ่ได้ รอยกรรมราชจักหลอน จักล่อ พระฤๅ รู้เท่ารู้เว้นไว้ กลัดกลุ้มมัวมนท์ ฯ 184 Seven full days spent in retreat, my son, Gathering enough merit to fill the sky, All to conceive a son of righteous heart, That was how I came to have you, my son. จำศีลบท่อยถ้วนเจ็ดวัน ลูกเอย คลังคลี่ทานผลปัน เท่าฟ้า ขอมีลูกใจธรรม์ ชายชอบ ใจนา แม่จึ่งได้เจ้าหล้า แม่แล้สุดใจ แม่เอย ฯ 185 Full ten months I held you in my womb, Not one moment did I forget my condition. From the minute when you were born I held and bathed you with the tenderest care. สิบเดือนอุ้มท้องพระ ลอลักษณ์ สงวนบ่ลืมตนสัก หนึ่งน้อย ตราบพระปิ่นไตรจักร เสด็จคลอด มานา ถนอมอาบอุ้มค้อยค้อย ลูบเลี้ยงรักษา ฯ 186 And three times a day I fed you Not letting anyone handle you wrongly, Protecting you the sharer of my life, And tended you till you could feed yourself. แลวันสามคาบป้อน เปนนิตย์ บมิให้ใครทำผิด แผกเจ้า แสนสงวนคู่ชีวิต ฤๅใคร่ กลายเลย เทียรผดุงคุ้งเท้า ตราบรู้เสวยเอง ฯ 187 With care I prepared your repast Never overlooking the minutest part, Tasting and dressing every dish, Never trusting others to take my place. บัญจงกับเข้าแต่ง ของเสวย บมิได้เลินเล่อเฉย หนึ่งน้อย สรรพเครื่องพระลูกเฮย ไตรตรวจ แต่งนา บวางใจกึ่งก้อย . แก่ผู้ใดทำ ฯ 188 I nurtured you since infancy Till you grew into manhood And mounted this royal throne, Your parting would kill me with grief? แต่น้อยแม่พรํ่าเลี้ยง รักษา พ่อนา จนเจริญชนมา ตราบได้ สมบัติผ่านภูวดา ถวัลยราช ฤๅพ่อจำจากให้ แม่นี้ตรอมตาย ฯ 189 In life I had hoped for haven in you, In death for you care of my remains, Now that you are leaving my bosom Who will light your mother’s funeral pyre? คงชีพหวังได้พึ่ง ภูมี พ่อแล ม้วยชีพหวังฝากผี พ่อได้ ดังฤๅพ่อจักลี ลาจาก อกนา ผีแม่ตายจักได้ ฝากให้ใครเผา ฯ 190 “Beyond holding back, sovereign lord, Beyond heeding your mother’s words, My heart is weighed with grief; Remaining here to burn in sadness.”… สุดใจสุดแม่ห้าม. ภูธร สอนบ่ฟังแม่สอน จักเต้า หนักใจหนักอาวรณ์ ทุกข์ใหญ่ หลวงนา แม่อยู่ตั้งแต่เศร้า โศกร้อนฤๅเสบย ฯ 199 “Thrive and grow in glory and might, Be you untroubled by all ills, Let all foes succumb to your powers, Be joyful and untouched by woes, จงเจริญศรีสวัสดิเรื้อง เดชา ทุกข์โศกโรคไภยา อย่าพ้อง ศัตรูหมู่พาลา พาลพ่าย ฤทธิ์พ่อ เสวยสุขอย่าเคืองข้อง ขุ่นแค้นอารมณ์ ฯ 200 May you have your wish with the two, May you not be snared by their charms, May you not forget Mother’s teachings, May you soon return to this brave kingdom” ขอลุสมสบสร้อย สองนาง ขออย่าลุเล่ห์ทาง เสน่ห์นั้น ขอคิดอย่าใจจาง คำแม่ สอนนา ขอพ่อเร็วคืนกั้น ขอบแคว้นไกรกรุง ฯ 208 Then to the chamber of the major consort To bid farewell. เสร็จผายผันสู่ห้อง เรือนหลวงโลมลาน้อง อยู่เจ้าจงดี แม่ฮา ฯ 209 I am leaving you behind but don’t grieve Soon I shall be back with you. เรียมจะลีลาสเต้า อยู่แม่อยู่อย่าเศร้า ไป่ช้าคืนสม แม่แล ฯ 210 Laksanawadi grieved so sorely that blood Nearly flowed from her flooded eyes. ลักษณวดีกรมทรวงสร้อย ทุกข์แทบเลือดตาย้อย เนตรนํ้านองนูน ฯ 211 Homage to my king, would you leave me To stay all alone? นบนิ้วทูลเจ้าหล้า พระองค์อาจละข้า บาทไว้ผู้เดียว พระเอย ฯ 212 Long roads are full of beasts and ghosts That trick and haunt ทางไกลเปลี่ยวสัตว์ร้าย ผีคนองหลอนคล้าย ทำเล่ห์ให้เห็นตัว ฯ 290 Less than a wife is a hundred lovers, Less than a mother a thousand wives, Hard it is to give birth and rear a child, To you, dear Mother, so much is owed. ร้อยชู้ฤๅเท่าเนื้อ. เมียตน เมียแล่พันฤๅดล แม่ได้ ทรงครรภ์คลอดเปนคน ฤๅง่าย เลยนา เลี้ยงยากนักท้าวไท้ ธิราชผู้มีคุณ ฯ

เธอ …. ผู้ไม่แพ้ เนื้อร้อง: สุรักษ์ สุขเสรี Lyric: Surak Sooksaree Translated: Khunying Chamnongsri Hanchanlash ในชีวิตของคนทุกคน Everyone has been ต้องเคยผ่านร้อนและหนาว through the bums and chills of life และพบเรื่องราวบางอย่างที่ฝังใจ And hurts that lie deep in the memory ทุกครั้งที่เธอปวดร้าว When your days are dark with pain หมดสิ้นกำลังที่จะก้าวเดินไป When you’re too tired to stride again วันเวลาที่แสนมืดหม่น When your heart cries agony ก็คงจะเดินผ่าน ๆ ไปช้า ๆ Then time goes so slowly จนเธอเองลืมนึกไปว่า ได้เดินมาไกลเท่าไร So slowly that you forget จนเธอเองมองข้ามบางอย่าง The strength and energy นั่นคือพลังแกร่งกล้าในใจ That you carry in your heart… ที่ยังฝังอยู่ในจิตใจลึกๆ ….. มานาน in your heart (และในวันนี้ (Now is the day เธอนั้นจงหยัดยืน To stride on your way และลุกขึ้นอีกครั้ง With your head held high ด้วยพลังในหัวใจ Draw strength from your heart อย่าไปยอมแพ้ให้กับปัญหาใด ๆ Make this your day of pride … of victory จงพร้อมจะอดทน Step out proudly ก้าวไปสู่หนทางที่ฝันใฝ่ ด้วยตัวเอง) You’re striding on the path to your dreams) บนถนนที่คนก้าวเดิน Along the roads you’ll see จะเป็นดั่งภาพสะท้อน The mirrors of reality ให้เห็นละครที่ต่างชีวิตไป Actors playing different parts ทุกครั้งที่เธอหมดหวัง Whenever your days turn dark หมดสิ้นกำลังท้อแท้ในใจ And hope grows dim, dreams go sour เธอจงมองดูภาพผู้คน Take a look at the people ที่อยู่เดียวดายด้วยความอ้างว้าง Who’re sad and lonely เพียงเธอมองไปนอกหน้าต่าง Look out there as you walk along จะเจอความจริงมากมาย See mirrors of reality คงจะทำให้พบคำตอบ And you will find your answer there ว่าบนทางเดินที่แสนยาวไกล On life’s long, long odyssey ทุกชีวิตต้องเดินออกไป The journey we all have to make เพื่อสู้ความจริง To face reality ให้เธอได้รู้ Trust your own heart นี่แหละใจของคน The heart is brave, ที่แท้ยิ่งใหญ่ the heart’s courageous ตราบใดความหวังยังไม่จางหายไป The heart where hope keep on shinning เมื่อนั้นใจจะไม่แพ้ Is always victorious (และในวันนี้ (Now is the day เธอนั้นจงหยัดยืน To stride on your way และลุกขึ้นอีกครั้ง With your head held high ด้วยพลังในหัวใจ Draw strength from your heart อย่าไปยอมแพ้ให้กับปัญหาใด ๆ Make this your day of pride … of victory จงพร้อมจะอดทน Step out proudly ก้าวไปสู่หนทางที่ฝันใฝ่ ด้วยตัวเอง) ก้าวไปสู่แสงทอง ของวันใหม่ ด้วยตนเอง You’re striding on the path to your dreams)

รักแท้ยังมีอยู่ เนื้อร้อง : จิ๊บ-วสุ แสงสิงห์แก้ว Lyric : Vasu Sangsingkeo Translated : Khunying Chamnongsri (Rutnin) Hanchanlash Photo by Khunying Chamnongsri Hanchanlash หากเพียงครั้งหนึ่ง If there was a time คุณไม่มีใครเขาต้องการ when no one wanted you ถูกทอดทิ้งมานาน จะรู้สึกอย่างไร* Without one to turn to, wouldn't you fell cold..cold? (ทุกทุกอย่างยังเหมือนกัน) (Same with everone) เด็กตัวน้อยๆ รู้สึกเหมือนกัน Same with little ones (ไม่มีใครต้องการ) (No one wanted you) ถ้าหากคุณหันไปมอง If you care to look, ก็จะเห็นและเข้าใจความจริง You'll know and understand เมื่อได้เห็นจริง When you truly see, ask your heart what ought to be ก็ถามตัวเองต่อไปว่าควรทำยังไง ว่าจะทำอะไร Ask what can be done ให้เขาไม่เป็นส่วนเกิน to give lonely little ones laugh and security ช่วยคอยชี้ทาง To show them the way ให้เขามีทางได้เดิน to warm their wintry ways และเขาได้รู้ว่า So they know that รักแท้แท้ วันนี้ยังมีอยู่ today there is love...love For the little lonely ones

หนึ่งเดียวคนนี้ เนื้อร้องโดย จิตนาถ วัชรเสถียร Lyric : Jitnad watcharastiean Translated: Khunying Chamnongsri L. Rutnin Photo : Khunying Chamnongsri Hanchanlash จากบทเพลงหนึ่งเดียวคนนี้ From the song “This Lonely Me” คิดว่ามีสักคนเข้าใจ Hope someone will understand ไม่คำนึงว่าเขาเป็นใคร I don’t care who may it be ไม่สนใจว่ามาจากไหน….. ไม่สนใจ Don’t even care where he belongs – don’t care ใครก็ได้สำหรับตัวฉัน Anyone is right for me ถ้าเขานั้นชอบฉันจริงใจ If he only loves me true; พร้อมจะให้ฉันพร้อมจะให้ Want to give, just want to give, ดวงใจดวงนี้ให้เขาไปเลย To give away this heart of mine. ดวงใจดวงนี้ช้ำมาครั้งหนึ่ง This lonely heart was once so hurt ความเจ็บยังตรึงเหลือที่จะเอ่ย The pain’s still worse than words can say ถ้าใครเคยช้ำเช่นฉันได้เคย If you were hurt as hurt was I จงมาลงเอยที่ฉันดีกว่า Then why not leave your heart with me? ซ่อมดวงใจที่แตกเป็นสอง Come and mend this broken heart, ทุกทุกห้องต่อด้วยเหล็กกล้า Every part make fast with steel. คิดเสียว่ายังมีวันหน้า Trust that there’s tomorrow still ยามนิทราหลับตาได้ลง And sleep will come with restful dreams.

La Belle Dame Sans Merci John Keats บทกวีของ จอห์น คีตส์ กวีชาวอังกฤษ (ค.ศ.1795 -1821) Translated: Chamnongsri Rutnin and Naowarat Pongpaiboon Image by HANSUAN FABREGAS “ โอ้ว่าอัศวินชินชาญศึก ‘O what can ail thee, knight-at-arms, ใยร่อนเร่ร้าวลึกล้าแรงร่อย Alone and palely loitering? ไม้น้ำเขียวเซียวซบทบทยอย The sedge has withered from the lake, ไร้สำเนียงนกน้อยลอยสราญ And no birds sing. โอ้ว่าอัศวินชินชาญสนาม ‘O what can ail thee, knight-at–arms, โทรมชานเทวศทุกข์ไปทุกด้าน So haggard and so woe-begone? เจ้ากระรอกเสร็จชุ่มเสบียงงาน The squirrel’s granary is full, ฤดูกาลเก็บเกี่ยวก็สิ้นแล้ว And the harvest’s done. ใยดอกไม้ซีดขาวบนเงาหน้า ‘I see a lily on thy brow, ร้าวรานราหมาดช้ำน้ำค้างแผ้ว With anguish moist and fever dew; และแก้มริ้วกุหลาบเคยฉาบแวว And on thy cheek, a fading rose มาพรากแพรวพร่าพรายไปเร็วพลัน” Fast withereth too.” “ฉันพบเธอเทพธิดาที่ท้องทุ่ง ‘I met a lady in the mead, เจิดจรุงเต็มงามดังความฝัน Full beautiful—a faery’s child, จากปลายผมจรดเท้าลำเพาพรรณ Her hair was long, her foot was light, และตาเธอนั้นคมขลับแวววับไว And her eyes were wild. ฉันเสียบแซมเกศามาลัยน้อย ‘I made a garland for her head, คล้องข้อมือคล้องสร้อยสะเอวใส่ And bracelets too, and fragrant zone; ตาสบตารักกรุ่นละมุนละไม She looked at me as she did love, สะท้านไหวหวานแว่วแผ่วรัญจวน And made sweet moan. ฉันประคองเธอคล้อยลอยอาชา ‘I set her on my pacing steed ลอยเวลาลอยวันมิหันหวน And nothing else saw all day long, เอนแอบแนบเคียงสำเนียงนวล For sideways would she lean, and sing ชวนฟังวังเวงเพลงนางฟ้า A faery’s song. เธอรินทิพยธาตุหยาดระยาง ‘She found me roots of relish sweet, ทิพย์น้ำค้างหวานฉ่ำน้ำผึ้งป่า And honey wild and manna dew, แน่วสำเนียงกระซิบทิพย์วาจา And sure in language strange she said, เมื่อเธอว่า “ฉันรักแท้ รักแต่เธอ” “I love thee true” เธอพาฉันดั้นด้นสู่หนแห่ง She took me to her elfin grot, สะทกสั่นกรรแสงสะอื้นเอ่อ And there she wept and sighed full sore; ฉันปิดกั้นทำนบแก้วแววละเมอ And there I shut her wild, wild eyes ด้วยจุมพิตสนิทเสนออยู่ซ้ำ ๆ With kisses four. และแล้วเธอก็กล่อมให้ฉันหลับ And there she lulled me asleep, แต่ฉันกลับฝันร้ายแสนร้ายร่ำ And there I dreamed – Ah! woe betide! ดั่งความฝันสุดท้ายสุดใจจำ The latest dream I ever dreamed บนภูเทือกยะเยือกย้ำเยียบวิญญาณ์ On the cold hill’s side. ฉันแลเห็นส่ำกษัตริย์สิ้นเกียรติศักดิ์ ‘I saw pale kings and princes too, นักรบนักต่อนักสิ้นศักดิ์ค่า Pale warriors, death-pale were they all; ล้วนกู่พร่ำ “นางงามนี้ไร้กรุณา” Who cried — “La Belle Dame sans Merci” บ่วงมนตราตรึงนับกัปกัลป์” Hath thee in thrall!” ฉันเห็นปากผากแห้งในแสงสลัว I saw their starved lips in the gloam และคำเตือนน่ากลัวจากปากนั่น With horrid warning gaped wide, ฉันตื่นขึ้นทันใดได้พบพลัน And I awoke and found me here บนภูเทือกยะเยือกสั่นครั่นคล้อย On the cold hill-side. นี่คือเหตุที่ฉันสัญจรเปลี่ยว And this is why I sojourn here ดายเดียวพับพ่ายไร้แรงร่อย Alone and palely loitering ไม้น้ำเหงาเซาซมทบทยอย Though the sedge is withered from the lake, ไร้เสียงนกน้อยลอยสราญ And no birds sing.”

บทกวี 3 ภาษา โดยคุณหญิงจำนงศรี หาญเจนลักษณ์ เขียนเป็นภาษาไทยและภาษาอังกฤษ ส่วนภาษาเยอรมันแปล โดย ศ.ดร. เจตนานาควัชระ เป็นส่วนหนึ่งของ งาน “Coming Closer” ซึ่งเป็นการแสดงผลงานของศิลปินไทยและเยอรมัน จัดขึ้นที่ กรุงเทพ เบอร์ลิน และสตุตต์การ์ต ในปี พ.ศ. 2550 จงกรม นกละเมอจิ๊บเบา เหมือนปลายเข็ม สะกิดเงาเงียบ โมงยามอ่อนเยาว์ เกินกว่าจะ แยแสความงามสล้าง ที่ทุ่งน้ำค้างแผ่เปลือยอวดฟ้า โลกหลับ คืนตื่น เบ่งบาน เย็นชุ่ม ห่มหุ้มคนที่เดี่ยวเดินกลางแสงจันทร์ แมกไม้ฉ่ำน้ำค้าง ยืนเหยียด เมยเฉย ไม่รับรู้รับเห็นการวิ่งวนในบึ้งใจ ที่คิดคูณคิด มายาฟักมายา อารมณ์คลอดอารมณ์ โลกหลับ คืนตื่น เผยโฉมหน้า ที่แปรเปลี่ยนไม่หยุดหย่อน ของนักมายากลมือฉมัง ชื่อ ‘ความทรงจำ’ ผู้คว้าลมมาปั้นเป็นความคิด แล้วเสกให้เป็นผีหลอนหลอกใจมนุษย์ หรือ สัตว์เขี้ยวสัตว์เล็บกัดฉีกในหัวอก หรือ ผีเสื้อปีกวิบวับ หรือ ปุยเมฆเบาบาง ที่ลอยผ่าน ห่างบ้างถี่บ้าง โซ่ลมล่ามความคิดลมๆไว้ กับหิ้งบูชาลมๆ แห่ง ตัวฉัน... ของฉัน คนนี้ จันทร์ซีดแสง จางสี ค่ำคืนถอยร่น คายโลกให้แสงหลัวก่อนอรุณสาง ขบวนคิดเรียวบาง จางลง แล้วขาดหาย ขอบคั่นระเหิด โมงยามระเหย อิสสระจากตรวนแห่งพื้นที่ และเวลา ธาตุรู้ แผ่ขยาย นวล นิ่ม ตื่น นิ่ง สะอาดใส กลืนกลาย เป็นหนึ่งเดียว กับสรรพสิ่ง (พฤศจิกายน 2549 สวนพุทธธรรม) Night Walk Chirp of a dreaming bird pricks silence of the hours that are too young to care how the fields bare their beauty to the sky Unacknowledged, the night blooms its velvet shared with the solitary walker Dew-drenched trees stand mute, detached, Moon-silvered non-witnesses of the traffic within where thought impregnates thought, mirage begets mirage emotion spawns emotions Unacknowledged, the night blooms mirroring the ever-shifting face of magician Memory who, with not even a wave of the wand, conjures thoughts and turns them into ghosts that haunt, or ungovernable beasts that tear and claw behind locked doors of human hearts, or butterflies that flit, or airy clouds - intermittent, weightless that drift pass in calm sky Invisible thoughts invisibly bound pegged and leashed to false altar of this I , these Mine Waning moon pales in western sky Night cedes to tentative sheen of prenatal dawn Thought-traffic thins ..ceases.. hours dissolve boundaries evaporate Unchained to time unbound by space, the Knowing …infinitely wakeful soft..still… pure… widens and melds into oneness with all things (Suan Buddhadhamma, Prachuabkirikhan, Thailand) Nachtspaziergang (Translated by Chetana Nagavajara) Das Gezwitscher eines träumenden Vogels unterbricht die Stille der Stunden, die noch viel zu jung sind, sich darum zu sorgen, wie die Felder dem Himmel ihre Schönheit entblößen. Unbeachtet entfaltet die Nacht ihren Samt, geteilt mit dem einsamen Spaziergänger. Taunasse Bäume stehen still, abseits, mondsilberne unbewusste Zeugen des Austauschs im Inneren, wo Gedanken Gedanken befruchten, Trugbilder Trugbilder erzeugen, Leidenschaften Leidenschaften hervorbringen. Unbeachtet entfaltet sich die Nacht, Spiegelbild des ständig wechselnden Antlitzes des Zauberers Erinnerung, der, ohne einmal mit seinem Stab zu winken, Gedanken hervorruft und sie in Gespenster verwandelt, die spuken, oder in Biester, die zerreißen und sich an die zugeriegelten Türen der Menschenherzen krallen, oder in flatternde Schmetterlinge, oder in luftige Wolken - flüchtig, gewichtlos-die am friedlichen Himmel vorbeiziehen. Unsichtbare Gedanken, unsichtbar gebunden, befestigt und vertäut am unsichtbaren Altar dieses Ichs, dieses sich unendlich vermehrenden Ichs. Sich zurückziehend verblasst der Mond. Die Nacht weicht dem unbeständigen Glanz des aufkommenden Tages. Gedankenverkehr verdünnt sich … hört auf. Grenzen schwinden. Stunden lösen sich auf. Von der Zeit entfesselt, Vom Raum losgelöst, das Wissen… unendlich weich, wach, still… rein in Eintracht mit allen Dingen.

Story: Chamnongsri L. Rutnin (Hanchanlash) Illustrtion : Kanjana Dumsopee List of Characters: Pipob: A bank executive. Age 46. Tipaya (Nickname Tip): A university professor, and the wife of Pipob. Age 42. Kloyjai: An active university student, daughter of Pipob and Tipaya. Age 21. Kaewta: The teenaged daughter of Pipob and Tipaya. Mildly intellectually disabled. Age 18. Pin: The family housekeeper. Nid: A university professor, a friend of Tipaya’s. Dohng: A severely intellectually disabled young man. Son of Nid. Krit:   A teacher at the special needs school for the mentally challenged. Sira: A male youth who attends the special needs  school. Sawidhri : A teenaged girl who also attends the special  needs school.   Non speaking roles: Male Teacher. 2-3 Mentally disabled females. 2-3 Mentally disabled males. Doctor no. 1 Doctor no. 2 Nurse no. 1 Nurse no. 2 Act 1, Scene 1 Waiting room of a child psychiatry clinic: Nid is leading Dhong inside. A nurse walks in from the opposite side of the room. Nid is a respectably dressed professor in her forties. She seems restless. Dhong is a tall 15 year old who is severely intellectually disabled. Nid tugs Dhong in order to get him to follow her. Nurse: Oh, hi Good morning Please wait for a moment. (Eases Dhong into a nearby chair and looks at Nid). How’s he doing? I haven’t seen him in quite a while, (talking to Dhong) my, you’ve grown a lot. Nid: Do you know when the doctor will be available? Nurse: Well, he has another patient with him and after this he’ll have to write a quick report. He’ll also have to go check up on another patient upstairs. (Turning to face Dhong with an endearing smile) , won’t be long now, though. A distraught Tipaya walks out of the examination room, it is clear that she has just been crying. Nurse: (Looks up), Hello Miss.You were quick. Nid: Tipaya, what are you doing here? Tipaya: (Surprised) Oh, Professor Nid. Uh… (Looks from mother to son). Nid: (Slightly embarrassed) That’s my son, Dhong. He’s Pohm’s brother. (Turns towards the nurse and explains) We teach at the same university. (Turns back to Tipaya) , It never crossed my mind that you would be here. Nurse: I’ll go check on the doctor. Tipaya: I didn’t know… I um… thought you only had Pohm and Piek. Nid: (She reaches in and grabs a small plastic bag containing a napkin. She reaches over to Dhong and methodically wipes away the saliva dribbling from his mouth). (Absentmindedly). Oh, we didn’t really want to let everyone know. Rumours spread like wildfire you know. Whenever he goes out, Dhong is treated like something different. Tipaya is at a loss for words, Nid glances at her and continues to clean Dhong. Nid: My mother said it was because we chose not to name him with a “P” like his siblings. That’s why he’s the way he is. But honestly, I think it’s complete hogwash. ( Keeps the napkin and closes her purse. ) Nid: How about you, Tipaya? What are you doing here? You’re not having problems with…Kloyjai, right? Tipaya: (Starting to tear up) Yes, I mean no…She’s fine. It’s… Nid: Are you okay, Tipaya? Tipaya: (pulling herself together) Yes. You remember I had to take leave last year? Nid: That’s right. Last year. I covered your lectures for you. Tipaya: Well, it was my youngest …she had a seizure. I wasn’t there. I should have been there. But I wasn’t. A lack of oxygen they said. Tipaya: She’s turning four this year. (Starts to cry) My daughter, she… she won’t speak, or play, or smile. She only cries, and each time she does, its always for so long, and then there’s the rocking; back and forth, back and forth, sometimes for hours. (Sobs). Nid: (Interrupts) But she’s human. I used to weep for my son, just as you are. But after a while, I doubt there are any tears left. (Turning towards her son) Dhong, no! Nid reaches towards her son, who has managed to lodge his fist into his mouth. The purse is opened once again, and another tissue emerges. Nid wipes Dhong’s fist and chin. Nid: What’s her name, your daughter? Tipaya: Kaewta. Nid: And the older sister, Kloyjai, right? How old is she now? Tipaya: Seven. Nid: Kloyjai and Kaewta, that’s adorable. Their names both start with the same letter, and yet Kaewta is how she is. Now I can get my mother to stop complaining. Tipaya is clearly trying not to laugh. She fails and bursts out with elated laughter. Nid sees this and smiles. Tipaya: So, do you come here often? Dhong starts rocking back and forth, very slowly. He hugs his knees to his chest and continues to rock. Nid: Oh no, it’s just that, lately…lately he’s been acting differently. Dhong, please, stop. ( Whilst speaking, Nid unclasps Dhong’s grip on his knees and firmly sets them on the armrest. She systematically sets him into a normal sitting position.) Tipaya: And uh, have you attempted to develop his learning capacity? I’ve heard that you have to start training their brains in the earlier stages. Nid: Of course. We did send him to a special school. But I don’t have time to take care of him myself, I have two other children who need me too. Tipaya: Does he still attend the school? Nid: He used to. But the transportation was such a fuss, and I struggled to get him there and back. They never had the transportation that they do today, you know. (Dhong starts to rock again) . Dhong! Stop! NId: Dhong, look what you’ve done. Now you’ve gotten your pants all wet. Nid opens her purse once again, but this time the plastic bag is a much larger one, and from it, Nid pulls out an even larger napkin, possibly a small towel. She gets Dhong to stand up in order for her to wipe the chair. Dhong immediately starts to run to and fro. Nid lets out a small yelp and the nurse comes running out to help Nid catch Dhong. Nid: Honey, are you alright? Where does it hurt? Tell me, where it hurts. Dhong grimaces and points to his stomach. Nurse: Aw, Dhong, you have a stomachache? Nid: He seems to be doing that a lot lately. Nurse: (LeadsDhong into the examination room. Dhong looks back at Nid, reluctant to leave her) . Come, Dhong, let’s have the doctor take a look at you. Nid: (Wipes the chair that Dhong managed to wet and then calmly places the towel into the plastic bag. She stuffs the bag into her purse. She speaks whilst doing so, and finishes talking just as she closes her bag.) When he was younger, he used to cry for hours, it drove the whole house mad. But now he tells us where he’s hurt. He doesn’t usually wet himself like this.Must be the excitement. Tipaya is frozen in shock and speechless at what she has witnessed. Tipaya’s hands find their way to her lips in an attempt to contain a sob. Nid looks up and calmly starts to speak, carefully selecting her words. Nid does not look at Tipaya as she speaks. Nid: When he was smaller, I once carried him up to the balcony. I was about to step off the ledge of the fifth floor with him. I thought that dying together would take away the burden on our family. But, I’m glad that I didn’t. A year later, their father died. Phom and Piek weren’t even in middle school. Tipaya: I never knew… Nid: You see me the same way everybody else does. The woman who works as if her life depended on it, the professor who never paid attention to anything else apart from getting her job done and going home. (Laughs and speeds up her speaking) , That’s true though, My whole family, our wellbeing depends on my income. (Walks towards Tipaya) . You’re smart. (Nods at the nurse as she grabs her bag and starts to walk in, but right before she leaves, stops to look at Tipaya) . You have to be strong, be stronger than I ever could. For your daughter. Nid walks out of the room. Tipaya stares at where she was standing as if Nid was still there Act 1, Scene 2 At Pipob and Tipaya’s house: Pipob is calmly sipping coffee. Six-year-old Kaewta is sitting comfortably on Tipaya’s lap while her mother reads from a children’s book to her. The book is set so that Kaewta can see the illustrations clearly. Stuffed animals and other children’s books lay scattered on the floor. Tipaya: (Pointing at an image in the book) A puppy! A large puppy! What sound does it make? Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! (Turns the page) A cat! A kitty cat! How do you meow? Meow, Meow, Meow. (Flips back to the previous page) Kaewta, who is this? It’s the puppy! How does he speak? Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! (Turns the page) What is this? He’s the cat. Cat, cat, cat! Pipob: (Looks up at Tipaya and carefully pours water into a glass) Honey, aren’t you feeling tired? (Hands the glass to Tipaya) Here, have some cool water to freshen yourself up. Enough with the kitty cats and the puppies, dear. Here, we should start reading this one, “Training Your Special Child”. Tipaya: Thank you. (Drinks the water and hands it back to Pipob and opens the child’s book once again) Look, Kaewta, look! What is that? It’s a bird! He flies high! High up in the sky. He can sing… Pipob: Enough, enough. We promised Khloyjai to take her to the movies, and its showing at 5. We have a bit of time alone… (He puts his arm around Tipaya, try to turn her towards him, moves his face closer to Tipaya’s as if to kiss her on the lips). Tipaya: Pipob! Our daughter is right here, aren’t you in the least bit embarrassed? Pipob: Of course not, she has no idea what’s going on. Tipaya: Oh, you. She’s right here. Pipob: (Sighs) Do you realize that ever since, ever since we learnt that Kaewta was like this… we’ve never had the opportunity to spend time together. We should go on a break, just the two of us. It’ll only be a few days. Tipaya: Even now? Pipob: (Suddenly looking sad). Yes..even now, we’re barely holding up, and we need all the income we can get. Tipaya: (Jokingly) You should’ve married a rich man’s daughter. Pipob: Yes, but I chose a brilliant and beautiful professor instead. Tipaya: (Laughs and opens the book once again) Kaewta! Look! Who’s that? Pipob: (pleading) Tip, please. You must be getting tired. Pipob lightly pokes Kaewta in the stomach, Kaewta remains stiff and pays no attention. Pipob and Tipaya exchange glances. Tipaya heaves a sigh. Pipob starts to move back, but changes his mind. Pipob: (Teasing his daughter) Are you tired? Is the baby tired? (laughs and pokes Kaewta lovingly) Kaewta giggles and reaches out her hand to poke her father twice. A gaping Pipob turns to look at his wife and finds that she is also speechless with surprise . The telephone starts to ring from another room and Pipob walks out the door to pick it up. Tipaya continues to show Kaewta the illustrations in the book. Pipob’s voice echoes from the hallway Pipob’svoice: Yes, this is Pipob speaking. Yes, Tipaya is here. (A shocked voice) The balcony? Tipaya: Little birdy, flies, up, up, up! Pipob’s voice: (His voice is trembling, this catches Tipaya’s attention and she looks up) Pohm doesn’t know yet? Oh no, it was the maid who was watching Dhong? Pipob: (Hastily walks into the room) Nid just called, Dhong just fell off of their balcony. I’m going to drop him off at the hospital. Tipaya: Why can’t Nid do it? Pipob: She called from the hospital. Tipaya: Really? Why? Pipob: Cancer …Intestines. Tipaya: (Caught off guard) Oh. I didn’t realize… She took leave, but… Whilst Tipaya and Pipob are talking, Kaewta is staring at the illustration on the page. She uses her finger to trace the picture and starts to mumble to herself. No one seems to notice. Tipaya is about to close the book, but Kaewta looks up at her father, and lets out a gurgling laugh. She starts to speak loudly, but stumbles on her pronunciations. Kaewta: (Points at the image) Birdy! Birdy! Up, up! Pin walks in and is staring at Kaewta, confused. Pin: Kaewta! What did you just say? Pipob: Honey, can you tell daddy what you said? Kaewta: Birdy! Flies, up, up, up! Tipaya puts her arms around Kaewta and carries her up. She affectionately rubs her cheek to Kaewta’s, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. Pipob plants a kiss on Kaewta’s other cheek. Pipob: Daddy’s brilliant little one. (Looks up) . I have to go. Pipob leaves. Tipaya: Kaewta…I have to go help Dhong. (Hands Kaewta to Pin and follows Pipob out of the door.) Honey, I’m coming too. Kaewta: Birdy! Birdy! Flies high, up, up, up! Act1, Scene 4: It is around 2 a.m.. We are in the same room, however, there is a piano set in the middle. It is 12 years later. 21 year old Kloyjai, has just come home. She is dressed in a short skirt and loose top and carries a light purse. Tipaya is facing Kloyjai, wearing a robe. Kloyjai looks exasperated while Tipaya is worried. Kloyjai: Yes, I can take care of myself. Tipaya: But it’s two in the morning, and you never called to tell us that you would come home this late. Where were you? Kloyjai: (Walks towards the piano starts to play a soft tune with one hand. Sarcastically, she says) Can I learn a new song? Today? Tipaya: (Exasperated) Please don’t do this again. At least tell us beforehand, it’ll save me a lot of worrying. Kloyjai: You worry about me? Tipaya: If I wasn’t concerned about you, what would I be doing awake at 2am? Kloyjai: Mom, you shouldn’t have to. (She adds cheekily) I’ve memorised that incantation. Tipaya: (Laughs) What incantation? Kloyjai: (sarcastically) Oh, just the one you’ve always taught me. “Kloyjai, please, I can’t help you right now. I’m busy with your sister” . And now, at 2 am. You finally have time for me. Maybe I should come back at this time, every day? Tipaya: (annoyed) Oh, don’t be ridiculous. Kloyjai: I’m gonna go check up on dad before I go to bed. (Yawns) I’m so tired. (Is about to walk out of the room, but Pipob walks in). Pipob: You’re finally back? (Walks in and pinches Kloyjai’s cheeks) . Kloyjai: (Speaking faster and sucking up) Daddy, please don’t scold me. I’m sorry. (Hugs her father) This won’t happen again. Pipob: Promise? Kloyjai: Um.. How about this? If I plan to get back after 10, I’ll call you so you’re not all concerned. Wait, make that 11. Pipob: (Laughs) Sure, sure. So, can you tell us where you were? Kloyjai: Of course, Daddy, of course. Chanin’s plane landed in the morning and he wanted to celebrate my graduation. He even bought me these gorgeous earrings! (tilts her head to show them the earrings) aren’t they beautiful? Pipob: (Adoringly) He seems to be bringing you a gift every time he flies. Did the celebration really take that long? Kloyjai: Oh, that. We um, went out a bit too. At Blank Ink’s. Daddy, don’t make that face! This was the first time I’ve ever drunk! Pipob: And how do you like it? Tipaya: (Confused) Who is this Chanin? Do you know him? Pipob: He’s an assistant pilot. Kloy’s boyfriend, or is it fiancé now? Kloyjai: Oh, daddy. Let’s just say he’s my husband to be now. Oh, and have you seen that belt that you bought? My friends seem to love it. Pipob: You can wear it now? You just told me yesterday that it was too loose. Kloyjai: I punched in another hole and now it fits perfectly. (Spins around) Pretty Chanin says so. (Remembers that her mom is still there) Mom, you should go sleep now, its getting late. (Pipob and Kloyjai walk out of the room. Kloyjai is humming a familiar tune). Pipob: Aren’t you teaching in the morning? Pipob leaves. Tipaya bends down to pick up a textbook that has been left opened and face down. Kaewta is in her pajamas, however, she is also wearing a thick, black leather belt. She innocently rubs her eyes, looking half asleep. Kaewta is plump, unlike her slim sister. She has pale white skin and a beautiful face. Kaewta is 19 years old. Her actions are like those of a normal person, soft and graceful. Kaewta: Mommy? I heard people talking. It’s late, why aren’t you sleeping? Tipaya: Your sister just got home honey. She was talking with me and dad. Kaewta: She only just arrived? She must be tired. Tipaya: Probably not, dear. Kaewta: (Not listening) I’m going to bring her some cool water. She must be tired, right? Tipaya: (Holding Kaewta back) It’s alright Kaewta. Your sister has just gone to bed. Kaewta: I’m going to bring you some cool water. You’ve been reading books all night, you must be tired, right? Tipaya: No, dear. I’m not thirsty. Why are you wearing a belt to sleep? Kaewta: (Lovingly touching the leather belt) Dad gave it to me. Tipaya: Yes, but he bought it for you to wear during the day, so you can be pretty (Reaches out to unbuckle the belt) Here, let me help you take it off. Sleeping in it will only be uncomfortable. Kaewta presses on her mother’s hands to stop her from undoing the belt. Kaewta: (Proud) I like it. I put it on all by myself. I didn’t even ask for Pin’s help. Tipaya: (Sighs. She looks at her daughter lovingly) Up to you. I just wanted you to sleep well. Kaewta curiously runs her hands smoothly across her waist and touches the belt. Kaewta: I sleep better like this. When I wake up and feel the belt around me, I feel safe. Tipaya: (Laughs and pats Kaewta’s shoulders) Time to go back to sleep. ( Kaewta strays towards the piano.) No, Kaewta. It’s late, and everybody is asleep. Kaewta: I’m going to play softly, I can help daddy sleep. Tipaya: (Puts her arm around her daughter’s elbow and starts to lead her off stage.) No, dear, it’s late. Act 1, Scene 5 At Pipob and Tipaya’s house: Kaewta is playing the piano with her mother standing next to her. Kaewta is attempting to impress her mother with her abilities. The song that she is playing has a delightful and catchy tune. Kaewta: (Stops playing) Do you like it? Tipaya: Yes, but you’re not playing with your left hand as much, so yesterday’s was a bit better. Kaewta: (Thinking) Hmm, I don’t remember yesterday’s. I only have today’s song today.  Tipaya: It’s the song you played for daddy yesterday. Kaewta: Um..Oh. Oh, the song I played yesterday. The “today’s song” of yesterday. Um, I don’t...something like this? Kaewta plays the same tune, but her left hand plays a different role. Kaewta’s left hand deftly challenges her right, playing more and more. Pipob walks through the door holding a briefcase. He walks straight towards the pantry and starts to make a cup of coffee. The moment her father walks in, Kaewta’s song is noticeably more lively, vying for Pipob’s attention. When Kaewta’s talents failed to impress her father, she immediately stops playing and walks towards him. Kaewta: Daddy, you seem tired. I’m going to get you some cool water. (Walks out). Tipaya: (Helps Pipob make coffee.) How was it, at the bank today? Pipob: Quite busy. It’s almost payday.  Kaewtaa walks into the room with a glass full of water. She hands it to Pipob and stares at him. Pipob: Thank you, honey. But, I’m going to drink some coffee first. So, what did you do in school today? Kaewta: We stopped making sail boats. Now we’re building a train. I’m in the group where we stick the train stickers together daddy! Pipob: Mhmm. Kaewta: There’s a new teacher today. He’s very good at drawing pictures. He’s also good at moulding. Tipaya: What’s his name? Kaewta: His name is (pauses to think) Krit. Pipob: Tipaya, don’t forget we have that company event this Saturday. Tipaya: (Attempts to hide her lack of interest) Pin’s on a break too. We’ll have to get Kloyjai to watch Kaewta. (Sighs). Pipob: It’s a big event. We have to be there. Kaewta: (Impatient) Daddy. Pipob: Mmm, yes? Kaewta: Did you get a lot of customers at the bank today? Pipob: Not really dear. Kaewta: (Worried).Then you can’t pay for the piano right daddy? Pipob: Of course I can. We’ll be out of debt by the end of this month. (Frustrated). Don’t eavesdrop on our conversation. Don’t talk to me about matters you don’t understand. It only aggravates me. Tipaya: (Hugs Kaewta’s shoulders) Pipob, please. Pipob: (Looks stressed. As he pats Kaewta’s head, tears start to form in his eyes. Pipob starts to walk away offstage). Alright, alright, it’s been a busy day. Tipaya eases Kaewta onto the piano seat. Kaewta: (Her voice devoid of emotion) Daddy is tired because we have to pay off the money for the piano. Tipaya: No, honey. This has nothing to do with the piano. Kaewta: (Monotone) There weren’t a lot of customers at the bank today. Tipaya: No, there weren’t. ( Tipaya looks towards Pipob who has just walked back on the stage. Pipob seems annoyed.) Kaewta, stop repeating things honey. Let’s play the piano. Kaewta looks after her father who has just left the stage and starts to play her composition, “Daddy”. The song stumbles inconsistently upon broken tunes. There are no chords and the song exhales an air of confusion. As she is playing, Kaewta starts to rock back and forth, but very slightly. She feels all alone. Tipaya: (Rushes to embrace Kaewta tightly. She shakes her softly.) Kaewta, daddy’s in the shower. He’ll be here soon. Kaewta, he’s coming. Kaewta stops rocking but seems to slowly collapse in Tipaya’s arms. Kaewta: (Like a machine) I won’t repeat things. Daddy doesn’t like people who repeat things. Tipaya: Yes, yes. I know. Kaewta: Mommy, I want you to meet Mr.Krit. A stylishly dressed Kloyjai walks in. Tipaya:  Wow! (teasingly) You look happy! What’s going on at work? Kloyjai: Good news mom! “Siam Air” wants me to drop by next Monday! Pipob enters the room and Kloyjai gleefully runs to him. Kloyjai: Dad! I got the job! Aren’t you excited? Chanin was cheering me when he heard! Pipob: Wonderful! (Pats her shoulder) I’m so proud of you! But, this must mean we won’t be seeing you very often anymore. Kloyjai: Of course you will! This means I can fly to Phuket to see you. Tipaya: Kloyjai, about Phuket, dad’s not one hundred per cent sure that we’re moving. Oh, you’re going to be in the air for so often! I’ll be so worried! Kloyjai: Mom, you should be happy, because this means you get to spend more time with Kaewta. (Proudly looks at her sister and teases her). Kaewta: You’re flying on an aeroplane? Kloyjai: Yes. Kaewta: Daddy, who can fly higher, the bird or the aeroplane? Kloyjai: Hey, Kaewta, can I borrow your belt tomorrow? I’ve barely seen you in it. Kaewta: (Confused) What… Kloyjai: (Annoyed) The belt dad bought you. Kaewta : But I wear it to sleep every night. Kloyjai:  For whom, Pin? (Laughs) Kaewta:  It helps me sleep. Kloyjai: Let me wear it tomorrow, please? Kaewta: (Shifting incomfortably) You won’t take it for long right? Kloyjai: (Stares at her sister) Fine. You can keep it. Pin: (Walks into the room) Dinner’s almost ready. Mrs. Tip, did you want to help fry the vegetables? Pipob: Come, Kaewta. Let’s go eat. Tipaya walks out with Pin. The two are followed by Kloyjai. Kaewta walks out with Pipob. Kaewta: (looks up at Pipob) Daddy, who can fly higher, the bird or the aeroplane? The stage is left empty and the lights are dimmed to show that dinner time has passed. The lights brighter up again when Tipaya and Pipob walk into the room. Tipaya starts to make coffee. Pipob: (Serious) About Phuket, we don’t have that much time left, there’s a problem at the headquarters there. Tipaya:   (Hands him the coffee without looking at him) You’re not changing your mind? Pipob: I have to travel next Monday. There’s a job on Wednesday. Tipaya: (Tipaya, slightly hurt, looks at Pipob and starts to fiddle) What about me and the children? Pipob: You all can come with me, if you  follow me (stares at Tipaya) We’ve already discussed this. There’s a deadline you know. In this  house, we have to pay our own rent. In that  house, the bank will be paying it for us! What else do you want? Tipaya: How about my job? Pipob: I told you, just resign. Phuket is the city of the rich. You can tutor someone’s rich kid. Think about the rent. Think about the income this job will get me. We’ll be free of all our debt. (Paces) I’ve done it your way every time. At fifty six, I finally got the job. (Laughs proudly) Tipaya: How about Kaewta? Did you know that just last week, she made over a hundred trains per day? Altogether that’s 1050 trains. She’s so proud that she can help you raise mone(y. Do you even realize how happy this makes her? Pipob: Kaewta will never be a normal person. Even now, no one will believe how far she’s gone. We’ve helped her so much. Tipaya, I’ve had enough. (Sarcastic voice) This is your fault. Tipaya: (Angrily turns her head) This is nobody’s fault! We’re the reason that she’s here. If we died before her… Pipob: (Shouting in anger) If! If! Tipaya: (Attempting to get her emotions under control) If I quit my job and someday you don’t come home, then what? Kaewta is proud that she can work. She’s in her own world. How can we take that away from her? She won’t have a job, she won’t have friends! Pipob: (Yelling) I’m only inviting you. You don’t have to come! Tipaya: You should go and visit Dhong. Pohm’s made a home for him in the room at the back of the house. Go look. You love Kaewta.Well, you used to love her so much. Pipob: My flight is in the evening. Think it through. (There is a moment of silence. Pipob’s face shifts from that of anger to sorrow.) Tipaya, you’ve changed so much. Remember when we were newly married? You use to drag me to the theatres, we would watch marathons. Tipaya: (Giggles) Really? I don’t recall that. But I do remember when we went to celebrate my pregnancy with Kloyjai. We were having dinner at the “Erawan” and it cost almost half of your salary! And the moment we got home, I had evening sickness. It was such a shame! (Laughs) Pipob: (Laughs) That’s weird, I don’t remember any of that. (A moment of silence passes and Pipob stands up to leave) Well, what else is there?  Even memories… We can’t even remember recall the same things. Pipob walks past Kaewta at the edge of the stage. Kaewta is relentlessly trying to clasp her belt, but in vain. Pipob stops and stares at his daughter, feeling confused. Pipob: (Looks kindly at his daughter) Here, let me. Kaewta glows with delight as her father meticulously secures the belt. Act 1, Scene 6 In “factory-room” of the Special School for the Educable Children: Kaewta, Sawitree, Sirah, and others are all carefully pasting colourful sitckers on rows of sticker trains. On a nearby table, boys and girls with a lower IQ are actually sticking individual trains into a long line before passing the trains on to Kaewta’s table for Kaewta’s table to paste animal stickers on the window of the train. A male teacher is overseeing the “train making” table while Krit is looking after Kaewta’s. Sawitree: I’m done. Male Teacher: (Pours a pile of unassembled sticker trains onto her desk) Here, there’s about sixty cars, so you could probably make thirty more trains. Sira is the same age as Kaewta. Although he is bigboned, he speaks and acts in a feminine manner. Sira seems frustrated as he can’t seem to be able to stick the stickers properly. Finally, he gets up and calls Krit. Sira: Mr.Krit? Krit: Yes? (Walks towards Sira) Kaewta looks after her teacher, but catches herself and quickly looks back down hastily continues to stick stickers. After a while, Kaewta starts to count the stickers, taking her time. Sira: There’s not enough glue. The stickers won’t stay in place. Krit: Let me have a look (tries sticking the sticker). It seems to be working fine. Sira: (Frustrated) Whenever I stick them, they’re always crooked. It’s the glue! Look at Kaewta, her glue is better. Kaewta:  How do you know? Kaewta looks up from her work and smiles at Sira, then continues to do her work. She has nimble fingers that seem to dance along the page as she flawlessly pastes the stickers. Sira: (Stands up and gazes at Kaewta’s work) See? Her glue is great. The stickers all go in the right place. Please, sir, can I have better stickers? Krit: Kaewta, would you trade some stickers with Sira? Kaewta quickly selects and passes the stickers to Krit with a bright smile. Krit passes these stickers to Sira. Krit: Alright, Sira. You now have the good stickers. Now, aim carefully and make sure to look at the outline of the train… yes… easy does it… perfect. Sira: I told you so. The glue is  not good. It is really bad. Bad.  So baadd. Here, here, here, it’s straight. Krit: (Chuckles softly) Make sure to go slowly, you’ll get better at it (Picks up Sira’s work to admire). Hmm… (Speaks to Siralike a pal)  Now… Sira, what isn’t so good?,  The glue or your mood? Sira:   The glue. (There is a moment of silence. Sira looks at Krit and starts to laugh. Sira looks at him and admit grudgingly)  Angry.  Not happy Krit: How come? Sira: Well, Kaewta.  She doesn’t  believe me. Krit:   What doesn’t she believe? Sira:  Peking Demon is inside my maid.  The demon pinch me. Kaewta:  All right, All right. You’re maid is … p..pos… ..sessed. Krit:   (Looks at Kaewta, surprised) Possessed?  You know the word, possessed?  Where did you learn it? Sira: And I talked to Kaewta but she doesn’t answer, she keeps saying that she wants to stick on more stickers. Kaewta: (Slightly embarrassed) that’s because you talk too much. It’s too much talking.  I want to do this..I want to finish this. Sira: She only wants money.  She says she want money for her dad.  Her dad pays for her piano. She loves piano. Kaewta makes up songs. Kaewta: I… I… (Looks at Krit as if confused)… He talks.  Talks.  He makes too much noise in my ears. Male Teacher: (From the corner of the room) Allright everybody! Break time. Everyone count the amount of trains you’ve done. Write it down on your work sheet.  Like this (Demonstrates) I’ll go around checking.  Then go for lunch in the main room now. Everyone starts to count their work, some quickly, some slowly. It is clear that Kaewta has completed more trains than others. The characters start to come off stage except for the male teacher and Krit who are checking the trains. Refusing to leave the room, Kaewta peeks after Krit. Krit: Aren’t you going to eat? Kaewta: I’m not very hungry. My dad tells me that I get fat too.  I am big.  I am heavy and he won’t carry me any more. (She pauses as if feeling sorry for herself.) My mom tells me I’m not fat. Krit: And who do you believe? Kaewta: (Confused) Can I believe Dad.  I believe Mom? (Krit chuckles) Daddy likes to talk to Kloyjai more.  Kloyjai is pretty, slim.  Her boyfriend, Chanin,knows how to fly, too. Chanin also only likes to talk to Kloyjai. Krit:  They like to talk to you too.   I like to talk to you.. Kloyjai:  (Look happy.  Then turns sad) Sometimes dad gets annoyed with me.  Sometimes he says I don’t understand what they’re talking about.  (Stops… Thinks) He doesn’t say, but I know. I know he wants to say I don’t understand what they are talking about. (Starts to repeat) Daddy thinks I’m too fat, but I can wear the belt he bought me. Krit:  (Watching her thoughtfully) Sira: (Walks into the room and listens to the last part of the conversation) you’re not fat. This is perfect. Sawitree…. (cringes) she’s too thin….so thin… Bones here, here. (Looks Kaewta up and down). I think you’re just about right. You have a pretty face too, (looks at Krit) Right? Kaewta is anticipating Krit’s answer. Krit: You’re not fat. I bet your dad was just teasing. Sira: When are we going stop making these things? (Points at the trains with a disgusted look on his face) Krit: Are you bored of trains? Sira: Not bored.   But why stick up these animals?  They live in Zoos.  Animals don’t ride trains,.  Never saw giraffe in trains. Krit: It’s a children’s toy. Sira: Kids know giraffes are in zoo.  Krit: Come, come. Let’s go prepare ourselves.  Lunch in 15 minutes. Sira walks out.   Krit still clearing up certain things on stage.  Kaewta lingers. Kaewta:    Can I stay?  Krit:  All right.  (Looks at time.) For 10 minutes.  (Goes on with some task)We’re changing the stickers next week. Kaewta: Really? That’s great! Krit: Oh, you don’t like the trains either? Kaewta: Oh no. I love trains. I love riding on a train to visit my grandmother in Prae (is suddenly still) Daddy says that a train needs tracks to run and that the tracks are all made of metal. I feel bad for the trains. Krit: (Interested) Why? Kaewta: (Confused) I don’t know. (Works quietly for a little bit) A train is forced to run on its track right? Without the railing, the train won’t be able to move… Krit: You don’t like the tracks? Is that why you feel bad for the train? Kaewta: (Looks up at Krit and tries to think of an answer) I’m not sure. Krit pulls out a cutter blade from his shirt pocket and starts to cut out some stickers in preparation for the next acitivity.   Kaewta watches him work for and then continues to paste stickers. Kaewta: Do you ride trains? Krit: Of course, that’s how I get back home to Ubol (pronounced Ooh-Bohn). Kaewta : Is Ubol in Prae? Krit: Not quite. Prae is in the north, while Ubol is in the northeast. Kaewta: The east is where the sun comes up right? I remember that Miss. Phensays sotaught me this. I never knew that trains could ride all the way to the sun. That’s wonderful. Krit: (Looks at Kaewta but mutters to himself) ‘Wonderful’.She believes that a train can reach the edge of the horizon? Kaewta: I’d like to take Daddy and mom on a train, and we can ride up to where the sky touches the ground. But the horizon is just so far away. Krit: Kaewta, you won’t get there. (Thoughtfully to himself as he looks at her.) The tracks won’t let you. Kaewta: My grandma’s house at Prae has a lot of really tall trees. Does your house in Ubol have these tall trees too? Krit: No, there’s not that many trees around where I live. There’s  lots of paddy fields for growing rice.  When we stand in the middle of the fields, we can see the sky in every direction… you know, you can see the sky everywhere you turn. You can see a few trees here and there, but the fields spread out.  Like squares of green velvet.  In some places you can hardly see where it all ends. Kaewta: (Is quiet for a while) When you look up, do you see any birds? Krit: (Awaken from his own thoughts) Of course.  Birds love paddy fields.  Kaewta: Do you think that Chanin’s aeroplane can fly higher than those birds? Krit: Yes, airplanes have strong engines.  They can fly higher than the birds. Kaewta: I think flying as high as a bird is good enough. Aeroplanes are really loud right? Krit: (Interested) Yes. Kaewta:  I don’t like engine noise.  It boom boom big in my ears. The booms are too big.  Voice of leaves are so nice.  They whisper.  Nice, nice whispers.  And little laughs, little laughs. Tipaya walks in but stands at the door listening in on the conversation. Kaewta: If we flew up on an aeroplane together, the boom boom wouldn’t let us to hear the sound of the sky right? Krit: (Starting to get cautious) No, we probably won’t hear the sky. Do you like birds? Kaewta: Yes. Could you draw me a picture of a bird up in the clouds? Krit: Of course. (Drawing and listening to Kaewta’s words, they both seem to be at ease with each other’s presence) Kaewta: I like seeing the birds fly. Sometimes they stretch, stretch, stretch out and their wings.  Like they want to touch the clouds.   Just like in you’re drawing , and sometimes they fly higher and higher… Krit: (Still drawing) The birds seem to disappear into the clouds, like this yes?  (Holds up his drawing for her to see) Kaewta: (Giggling) Yes, yes. I love it when they do that, and some bird sweep the skies with their wings and ,make those beautiful  (Kaewta makes arches with the full length of her right arm, them joyeously open wide both arms swirling herself to create arches almost like an awkward yet beautiful dance)  I beautiful, beautiful, beautiful in the sky.  And (breathlessly) colours, colours  too.  (Stop and thinks)  they’re called, umm… Krit: Rainbow.  (After watching Kaewta with something close to fascination)  Rainbow, Kaewta. They’re called rainbows. Tipaya walks in as Kaewta is speaking and stares at the two of them without either of them knowing it. Tipaya: You must be Mr.Krit. Krit: (Wai) Yes. Tipaya: I’m here to pick Kaewta up for lunch and then take her to the orthodontist’s . Krit: Yes, MissNongNutch already let  me know. Kaewta: I don’t want to go yet. Mr.Krit hasn’t finished my drawing yet. Tipaya: You like the nice dentist right? Let’s not make her wait, dear. Kaewta: I don’t want to go. Krit: I’ll color it in tomorrow for you, but please just go with your mom first. Kaewta grudgingly collects her things. Tipaya: Mr.Krit, are you new at teaching? Krit: Yes, I just moved here this semester. Tipaya: If you don’t mind me asking, what did you major at in school? Krit: No not at all. I have a degree in Psychology. Sira walks in. Kaewta: (Angrily) I don’t want to go see the doctor today. I don’t like it when you pick me up early. Sira: (Walks in to greet Tipaya with a ‘wai’) SawasdeeKrub, Ma’am. Why won’t Kaewta talk to me (teasingly) She only likes to talk to Mr.Krit, here.   Act 1, Scene 7 At Pipob and Tipaya’s house. A disheartened Kaewta is sitting at the piano, playing ‘Daddy’. She is rocking slightly. Although Tipaya is listening to her daughter play, she doesn’t come in to console her and allows Kaewta to grieve alone. Kaewta is quiet but continues to rock. Tipaya finally walks across the room and places a hand on Kaewta’s shoulders but Kaewta recoils from her touch. Kaewta stands up and stares blamingly at Tipaya. Kaewta: When is daddy coming back? Tipaya: (Hurt) He’s told you already. Next month. Daddy told you this right before he boarded, at the airport, remember? Kaewta: (Raising her voice until almost screaming) You fought with daddy, that’s why he left. Daddy loves me. He loves me. He wants to stay with me. You fought with daddy. You drove him out! Tipaya: No dear. Daddy went to work. Remember? He told you. Kaewta, I love you too. Starts walking towards Kaewta, but Kaewta steps away. Tipaya: I love you Kaewta. Kaewta suddenly goes still while Tipaya cautiously walks towards her. Tipaya carefully pulls Kaewta into a hug, and Kaewta starts to cry in her mother’s arms. Kaewta: I love you too, but I miss daddy so much.  I want daddy to hug me. (Sobs. She then looks up at her mother and starts to speak in a hardened tone) Why did you have to fight with daddy? Tipaya, overwhelmed, steps out of the embrace. There is a spotlight on her as everything else goes dark. Tipaya: (To herself) Fight with daddy? Pipob’s voice echoes in Tipaya’s mind. Pipob’s Voice: The application of psychology in developing agricultural communities. Guest speaker Professor Tipaya can’t leave the lecture, but she can leave her high fevered baby at home alone with a maid. At home alone  to suffer a seizure. A seizure so severe that it damages the child’s brain beyond repair. I’ve never said a word about this to hurt you. I used to love you so much, Tipaya. But you, you with your guilt… oh, the guilt made you obsessive.  Actually, you have always been obsessive.  You know with what?  Success, Tipaya.  Success in everything you set out to do.  Your career.  Yes, and marriage.  Well, That, until your failure with Kaewta.  Right?  You baby became a mental retard because of your obsession with career success.  You had to succeed in something else, right?  In developing your little girl from the predicted 6 year-mental age to as far as far as any living mother can do, yes further than any living mother can do.  Yes, yes.  The obsession took over again didn’t it,  Tippaya?  And in the course of it you have succeed in blighting love.  Love between usI don’t even know if I can still feel love anymore. Tipaya, everyone respects you for the things you have done… the wonder mother, how much and how well you have helped our Kaewta. (Bitter Chuckle) Professor Tipaya, adept in the field of human development, but I’m human too. You seem to have forgotten that. Be careful Tipaya, the sin that you’re so set on cleansing is going to bring upon your downfall. You’re simply too good at what you do, and it will consume you.   Act 1, Scene 8 At Pipob and Tipaya’s house: the same setting as before. Kaewta is playing the piano profusely, her nimble fingers dancing on the keyboard. Kaewta is softly playing the song, ‘Daddy’. A stylish Kloyjai walks in humming. Kloyjai: Where’s mom? Kaewta: She’s at..um.. I don’t know. Kloyjai: I just got back from Phuket. Dad told me to tell you that he misses you. Kaewta: (Suddenly brightens up) When is daddy coming back? I miss him. Kloyjai: (Not listening) It was so fun, Kaewta. Chanin taught me to water ski, I’ve got bruises all over to prove it too. Kaewta: Bruise how? Are they green or purple? Kloyjai: Dad’s doing really well, a lot better than he was here, he’s called the ‘Big Boss’ there.  Aurachon’s pretty attached to him if you ask me. Kaewta: Who’s attached to daddy? Kloyjai: WanAurachon, whose father owns the beach restaurant. In fact, we just celebrated there, good restauraunt. Kaewta: Is WanAurachon a girl or a boy? Kloyjai: Obviously a girl. She’s gorgeous too. Hey, look at this, she got me a bracelet. Don’t you just love it? Kaewta:  And when is daddy coming back? Mom says maybe next week… Kloyjai: Dad can’t come back next week. Aurachon’s got a guest coming from abroad, they’ve planned a trip together. Kaewta: Why isn’t Daddy coming back? Kloyjai: Well they invited him on the trip too. This man is very important you know, he’s a foreigner who’s willing to invest a lot in Thailand. (Pauses) Listen Kaewta, I’m about to tell you something very important. Kaewta: Wait, I’ll be back in a minute. Kaewta walks out. Kloyjai is daydreaming with a wistful look on her face. Kaewta walks back in with the belt and Kloyjai pulls her sister into a nearby chair. Kloyjai: Kaewta, we need to have a little chat. I’m really happy right now. So, so, so happy. Kaewta is trying to hand the belt to Kloyjai the whole time that Kloyjaiis speaking. Kaewta: I want you to have this. Kloyjai: Kaewta, a month from now, Chanin and I will be married. Kaewta: (Trying to give the belt to her sister) You wanted this belt right? I’m giving it to you. Kloyjai: (Not listening) Aren’t you happy for me? (Glances at the belt and finally understands what Kaewta is saying) Thank you, but it’s alright. Chanin bought me a lot of those from the states. I know you love it, so you can keep it. Kaewta: I don’t love it. Kloyjai: (Instantly annoyed) Fine, whatever, thank you. Are you going to listen? Kaewta: Yes. Kaewta:  Listen carefully, after Chanin and I are married, we’re going to fly off to Japan… Kaewta: Mr.Krit says that birds can fly higher than airplanes. Kloyjai: …for a honeymoon Kaewta: (Suddenly interested) What happens in a honeymoon? Kloyjai: Oh.. Uh..Kaewta, do you want to know how he proposed? We were just talking and he suddenly grabs my hand and whispers in my ear, “We’re going to get married next month, Kloy”. Kaewta: (Very interested) And what else did he do? Kloyjai: (Stares at her sister, unsure of whether to continue or not) He pulled me into a hug and kissed me twice saying that each kiss was for a child that we would have. Kaewta: Kissing means that you have babies? Kloyjai : (Not listening) Once we’re married, I’m going to move in with Chanin. I’ll finally get out of this place. Kaewta: Are you going to fly there? (Kloyjai is deep in thought and unresponsive to Kaewta’s questions). Kloy… Kloyjai: Yes? Kaewta: Mr.Krit’s house is in the east where the sun comes up. The sky there is so large and open, and when you look up, you see birds flying everywhere. Kloyjai: (Laughs) Well, this teacher of yours is very descriptive. Alright, I’m going upstairs. Kaewta seats herself by the piano and starts talking to Kloyjai who is humming happily as she walks out. Kaewta: (Kaewta talks to the piano) I want to go live in Mr.Krit’s house. (Sits still and looks up with determination) Mr.Krit loves me. Kaewta starts to play the tune of ‘Daddy’ on the piano. However, there is a noticeable difference in that the song is happier and filled with hope rather than anguish and disappointment. The speed varies widely, slow to fast, according to Kaewta’s emotions. The song is inconsistent because Kaewta is composing it as she goes along. Tipaya walks in on Kaewta and listens. Tipaya: That’s beautiful, what is it called? Kaewta: ‘Skies’. Tipaya: This song’s name is quite different from your usual names, how come? Kaewta: (Thinking) I don’t know. Mr.Krit told me that the sky in Ubol is so broad and open. You could look up and see all the birds. Tipaya: (Thinking of a way to change the topic) When school closes, we’ll go to Prae to see all the birds.  Do you remember when you found the bird with the broken wing and nursed it back to health? Kaewta: (Laughs with glee) Yes! I told him to be careful, or else he might break his wing again. He flew up, up, up and right into the clouds. We’re visiting grandma by train? Tipaya: Yes, just the way that we’ve always have. Kaewta:  I want to ride that train to where the sun sinks into the ground. Tipaya: The place where it looks like the sun is touching the ground is called the horizon. Kaewta: Yes, that’s it. I want to take you on a train right to where the sun rises. I want to take Daddy, and grandma and Pin. Oh, and Kloy and Chanin too. Tipaya: Trains can’t go that far. No one can go that far. We can only see the horizon honey, it’s really far away. It seems like it’s where the sky meets the earth, but it’s only an illusion. Do you understand? Kaewta: Mr.Krit says that there are trains that can go there. The sun comes up in the east, which is where he lives. He’s going there during the break. Tipaya: You must’ve heard him wrong dear. Kaewta: That’s what he said. He also told me that aeroplanes can fly higher than birds, but I think they’re loud, so it’s best if they just fly soundless like birds. I bet the birds love to sound of the sky. Tipaya:  You seem to like Mr. Krit a lot. Kaewta: I like to talk to him about trees, and rivers, and his house. It’s the same way that Chanin and Kloy talk. She’s told me about their talks. Tipaya: (Shocked) You must really like him. Kaewta: I really do. (Thinks) Mom? Tipaya: (Cautious) Yes, honey? What do you want to ask? Kaewta: (Nostalgic) When a man holds a woman’s hands, does it mean he wants to marry her? Tipaya: Why do you ask? Kaewta: Does it? Tipaya: (Choosing her words carefully) Not always. It depends on how he holds her hand. Kaewta: And if he kisses your hand it means that you will have one child? Do two kisses means two children. Tipaya: (Growing uncomfortable) No, dear. I don’t think you understand. Tell me why you want to know this? Kaewta: I just do. Tipaya: (Grabs both of Kaewta’s hands and looks her in the eyes) Did anyone do this to you? Kaewta delves into imagination and starts to lose touch of reality. Kaewta:  Yes. Mr. Krit. Tipaya lets go of Kaewta. Kaewta  starts to play ‘Skies’. This time, the song is complete and reflects Kaewta’sinnocence and happiness. All the lights starts to dim the moment that Kaewta starts to play and shines on a corner of the stage: The Kitchen. We can see Pin beating eggs. Tipaya walks into the kitchen and the song fades out slightly indicating that we are now in a different room. Tipaya: (Holds her hand up to silence Pin’s beating) Pin, listen… Kaewta’s never played something so beautiful. Pin: (Admiring the song) It’s amazing. (Proud) My pretty child, she’s getting more and more beautiful every day. (Looks at Tipaya) Mrs. Tip, are you alright? Tipaya: (teary-eyed) Yes, I’m fine. It’s just, this song is incredible. Pin: Isn’t that a good thing? Tipaya: It’s been shaped from the song ‘Daddy’ that I named for her. It’s the song that Kaewta would play  every time her father ignored her or hurt her feelings. Pin: Oh. Tipaya: But that song, it turned into this. Kaewta named it herself. It’s just so melodious and pure. (Stops to think) And yet, there’s this feeling that I just can’t shake off. This situation, this song, is too good to be true. (The song ends and Tipaya makes up her mind). Pin, I’m going to need to set up a meeting with Mr.Krit this Saturday. Act 1, Scene 9 At Pipob and Tipaya’s house. (The stage is clear) Pin’s voice:    (Offstage) You finally got Dhong back? I’m so relieved. Pohm’s voice: (Offstage) Haven’t you heard? The police called me to pick him up at the station yesterday. Wheres the professor? Pin’s voice: (Offstage) She’ll be back soon, she’s on an errand. She’s got an appointment with Kaewta’s teacher at four. Pohm’s voice:  (Offstage) I called the professor last night asking her if I could drop Dhong off. I’ll be back to pick him up in the afternoon. There’s nobody at home, and I don’t really want him to go missing again. Kaewta walks in and seats herself at the piano while the sound of the conversation flows into the room. Pin’s voice:    (Offstage) Where did the police find him? Pohm’s voice:    (Offstage) He was sitting in the middle of the market. Topless.  Someone just took his shirt and he was really dirty. Pin’s voice:    I bet he took a lot of cleaning. Pohm’s voice:   Yes, definitely. I have to go soon. But he won’t make a mess, I promise. If he needs o go, he’ll tell you. Kaewta: (Stands up and walks towards the direction of the voice) Pin, who’s here? Pin half walks half drags Dhong into the room. Dhong is now 34 years old. He looks pale and is dressed in long trousers and a clean shirt. Pin: This is Dhong, the man who your parents have been talking about. Kaewta:  (Looks at Dhong as if he were a normal person) Uncle Pohm’s brother? Pin:  Yes. Pin sets Dhong into a chair. Dhong starts to rock back and forth. Kaewta: (Greets him with a Wai) SawasdeeKa. (asks Pin) Uncle Dhong is retarded, I mean, disabled like me right? Pin: That’s not true. You’re good at the things you do. This one can barely even speak. Kaewta:  I’ll talk to him. Uncle Dhong, you are like me. (Carefully sounds out the words ‘intellectually disabled’) Pin: That’s good. I’m going upstairs to clean. If he makes a commotion, shout for me. Kaewta: So you want me to call you when he needs the restroom? Pin: You are amazing. Kaewta: Pin, could you get some water for uncle Dhong? Pin: (Adoringly) Yes, Ma’am. I’ll be right back. Pin walks out. Kaewta:  I’ll stay here with uncle Dhong. (Grabs a pillow for Dhong to rest on) This will be more comfortable. You stay at home all day, so you must be lonely right? When I’m lonely, I play the piano and look at the pictures in books. Pin walks in and places a cup of water on a nearby desk, she looks up and adores Kaewta for a moment and then walks out. Kaewta:  Here’s some water. (Hands the cup to Dhong who is still rocking back and forth, though less so) Don’t you want some? (Looks at Dhong and is eagerly waiting for an answer, while Dhong further slows his rocking). Here, I’ll help you. Kaewta feeds the water to Dhong and reaches for a handkerchief from her pocket to clean the water trickling down Dhong’s chin. Dhong stops rocking and looks at Kaewta, who smiles back at him. Kaewta: I don’t really feel lonely though, because I get to go to school. When I’m at home, I think about Daddy. He’s strong. Mr.Krit is strong too. Yesterday, he carried my work box. (Starting to daydream) He has large hands you know, and they are the same color as the belt that Daddy bought for me. Kaewta starts to daydream about her teacher but soon remembers that Dhong is there with her. Kaewta stands up and looks for a book. Kaewta: Daddy likes to buy picture books for me. I love them, and I think you will too. While Kaewta is choosing a book to show him, Dhong suddenly stands up and starts flailing his arms about and muttering loud, indiscernible noises as he looks downwards. Kaewta rushes towards him. Kaewta: You need to use the bathroom? (looks downward) Oh, I see. It’s only a tiny cockroach. It’s already gone, you’ll be fine. Eases Dhong into a chair. Dhong starts to rock heavily. Kaewta tries to calm him down; she puts one of her arms around his shoulders and rocks back and forth slowly with him to alleviate him. It seems to be working and Dhong gradually stops rocking. Dhong puts his head on Kaewta’s shoulders. The scene looks like a mother and her child sharing each other’s warmth. Pin’s Voice: (Offstage) Welcome, sir. Mrs.Tipaya is not in right now but she’ll be back soon. Kaewta is here though. Krit walks in and stops at the doorway to appreciate the site of Kaewta and Dhong. Kritstands there trying to comprehend an emotion an emotion that is beginning to form. Krit: What are you doing, Kaewta? Kaewta looks up in surprise, once she sees who it is, a smile forms on her face. Dhong does not register any new presence and continues to sit in the same position. Kaewta: I’m calming uncle Dhong. Krit: (Cautious) I don’t think you should be… uh… Kaewta loosens her grip on Dhong. Kaewta: Did you come to see me? Krit: (Friendly tone) Are you happy that I’m here? Kaewta: (Holds her breath) I am more than happy! You should come here more often. In fact, you should come here every day! Krit: (Chuckles) I can’t come every day… Kaewta: But I want you to come every day… This is uncle Dhong (to Dhong).You’re better now right? (Eases herself out of Dhong’s grip and sets him so that he can sit by himself) It’s only a tiny insect, so I’m going to let you sit by yourself now. (To Krit) He’s afraid of cockroaches. I’ll go get you some water. Kaewta is about to walk out but Pin is already bringing the water in. Kaewta: Oh Pin! Just in time! Kaewta hands the glass to Krit. Pin leaves, and Krit goes to greet Dhong. Krit: How are you Dhong? I didn’t know Mrs.Tipaya had a little brother. Kaewta: Oh no, his brother is a friend of Mom’s. Like a fake brother. Krit: (Adoring her) Oh, so he must be a fake uncle then. Kaewta: Uncle Dhong really has a fear of cockroaches, he was shaking all over. So then I tried to soothe him the same way that Daddy once soothed me. Daddy used to hug me tight and I just stopped being scared. Sometimes, I even want someone to hug me the same way that Chanin hugs Kloyjai. Krit starts to get increasingly uncomfortable. He looks at Kaewta warily. Krit: Don’t hug a man like that again. Kaewta: Why can’t I hug uncle Dhong? Krit: Because, it’s not… not appropriate. Tipaya walks in to listen to the last snippets of the conversation. Kaewta: You’re here to talk with my mom about me? Krit: Yes, your mom asked. Kaewta: (Excited and happy) Just like the way Chanin came to talk to mommy and daddy about my sister! Tipaya walks in. Krit: Oh, I just got here. I was afraid of getting stuck in traffic so I left a bit early. Tipaya:  (To Kaewta) You must be glad that your teacher is here. Kaewta: Yes, I’m glad. (To Krit) Do you want to listen to ‘Skies’? I wrote it myself. It’s inspired by the stories you’ve told me about your home. Krit: (Interested) Inspired how? Tipaya: Not yet, honey. Your teacher is here to talk to me about something very important. Once we’re done, you can play. Pin walks in. Tipaya: Pin, could you take Kaewta and Dhong upstairs? To Kaewta’s room? Make sure the door is closed and stay with them too. Only come down once I call. Pin : Come, Dhong, come. (Leads Dhong by the hand) Kaewta, you too. Kaewta: But I want to stay… Pin: Hurry up, dear. Kaewta: (Indignant) But I want to stay! I want to play ‘Skies’ for Mr.Krit. Can I? Tipaya: Go upstairs. I’ll call you down when we’re done. Then you can play. Kaewta follows Pin and Dhong out. Tipaya: Please, sit. (Krit sits) I doubt there’s ever been a parent who’s invited you all the way to their house for a talk. Krit: No, not yet. If I do get called to a student’s house, it’s for ceramics and drawing. Tipaya: You are very admired by Kaewta, which is why I called you here. How do you like the house? Krit: It’s very lovely… Tipaya: (Murmurs) It’s very lonely. Pauses. Tipaya: Kaewta’s father is working in Phuket. He only visits once a month. Krit: Kaewta has told me that. She seems to be very attached to her father. I noticed that she used to talk about him quite a lot when he left. Tipaya: Does she still? Krit: Not as much as she used to. She used to look tired and drained but now she’s very alert. Kaewta talks a lot more now (Laughs with delight when he thinks of Kaewta) She shows a lot of interest in everything. Tipaya: Is that so? Krit: (Thinking) Yes, I think so. Lately, she’s getting better in everything she does. She’s very happy. Yesterday she picked a flower, put it in a vase, and left it on my desk. Tipaya: You’ve really helped her a lot. More than other teachers have. Krit: (Chucklees) Thank you. I think it’s because I pay attention to her. Kaewta is a lovely girl. Tipaya: (Pauses) Lovely? Krit: Uh… (Changes his tone to a serious one) Her rate of development is… Tipaya:   Remarkable? Krit: Yes, that’s it. She’s a thinker.  It’s just, her words… I sometimes have to contemplate them for days. Tipaya: I’m glad that you… like her… a lot. She even wrote a song you know. It’s called “Skies”. She says it’s been inspired by the things you tell her about your home in Ubol. Krit: (Laughs heartily) Inspired how? Tipaya: Well, she told me that the sky there is wide and open and that every time you looked up, you could see birds soar. Krit: (Getting nervous) And she turned that into a song? It’s a shame, she would be very talented if she weren’t… Tipaya: (Thinks of Pipob’s words and starts to become defensive) If she weren’t mentally disabled because her mother left her to a seizure? Krit: Sorry, that’s not what I meant. Tipaya: (Calms down) Nevermind. (Walks towards the window and stares out at it) I guess it’s about to rain. (Pauses to choose her words) Kaewta asked me to go on a train ride with her, to your home. Where are you from? Krit: Ubol, Ma’am. Tipaya: And you’ll let us visit? Krit:  You can stay for as long as you like. But not many people tend to stay in Esan very long. Tipaya: If we did stay for long, wouldn’t you get tired of Kaewta? Krit: Of course not! I’ve never been annoyed with her. You can visit whenever you like.This break maybe? Tipaya: Thank you. (Pauses) The psychiatrist recommended sterilization a while ago… Do you think Kaewta has the chance to have a family like a normal girl? Or do you think it’s time for me to finally get  it done? Krit: (Misunderstanding Tipaya. Speaking logically) Well in theory, an intellectually handicapped, if able to take care of him or herself to a certain level, should have the right to have a family. Tipaya: I’m glad that we both have the same opinion on the topic. Krit: It’s really up to you, Professor. You’re Kaewta’s mother. Do you think she’s capable of becoming a wife? Tipaya: I don’t know how far the boundaries of a wife’s duties stretch. I don’t know who set them. But I do know that Kaewta can feel love and pain, she can express them as well. Kaewta can love much more than a normal person can. But the question is not about her ability to love, it’s about her ability to survive. Am I right? Krit: Yes. Tipaya: What do you think, Mr.Krit? Can she lead a married life? Krit: It’s possible. (As he is speaking he thinks about the way that he feels towards Kaewta) But it really depends on the person… Tipaya: (Begins to hope) On how much he understands her? Who was it that told me that you and Kaewta can carry on a conversation for ages? Krit: ( Confused) Yes, I can talk to her. As a teacher I have to try to understand her… Tipaya: Yes. You seem to understand her better than anyone else. That’s why she likes you so much. Even the things that you say, she’s managed to turn them into a beautiful song. Kaewta… she is capable of loving. My daughter doesn’t feel hate. What do you say? Krit: I… um… I don’t understand… It’s true. The things that you say.Kaewta doesn’t seem to have a drop of hate inside her. Tipaya: Yes. So this break, I’m going to take Kaewta to visit your parents, to make it official. Krit: (Confused) Visit my parents? Uh… they’ll probably like her. Tipaya: That’s great. Not that many people would want a handicapped daughter-in-law. Krit: (Very confused) Yes. Not that many… who are you talking about? Tipaya: Why, your parents of course! Krit: Excuse me? Tipaya: We were talking about whether or not your parents will like Kaewta. They must be really good hearted people to not feel disgusted by the thought their son marrying a handicapped. Krit: Uh… Professor, I think you must misunderstand… you don’t mean that I would… marry Kaewta? Tipaya: (Disbelieving) What? I didn’t think you were so… indecisive.  Krit: I’m not indecisive, ma’am. The thought of marrying Kaewta never even crossed my mind. Tipaya: But… but then why would you do those things to her? Krit: (Confused) I… what things have I done? What have you been hearing? Tipaya: What have you  done? Don’t pretend you don’t know . Krit is pacing back and forth attempting to understand the situation. Tipaya looks after him. Krit: I’m sorry, but who has been telling you these things? Tipaya: Why, Kaewta, of course. Krit: Kaewta… what has she been saying? Tipaya: You can’t even recall the things you’ve done to my daughter? Krit: What things? I’ve only tried to help her as a any teacher should. Tipaya: How about her? Has she not helped you at all? Krit: Help me? Help me how, ma’am? I’ve put in all my effort to help her grow as a student… Professor, you know that I’m… Tipaya: A saint or some sort of angel who’s here to help out a poor disabled girl? (Kaewta walks in, she looks cheerful and happy. She stops at the edge of the stage and listens to the conversation) She’s told me that you’ve been holding hands… that you’ve been kissing her palms… who knows what else she’s said because she thinks of you as her angel. Krit: (Sighs deeply) …What? (Tries to keep his emotions in check, speaks slowly) Professor, you must know that these… things that you’ve been hearing are only a result of her imagination. Kaewta doesn’t have the ability to distinguish reality from fantasy.  Tipaya: How can you say that? Knowing full well that she can’t defend herself… Krit: In that case, I have nothing else to say. Goodbye. A startled Kaewta tries to follow Krit, but stops at the piano. Tipaya: (Attempts to belogical, but becoming increasingly irrational.Tipayas behavior increasingly resembles ananimal frantically trying to save its offspring) Wait! We need to talk! It’s obvious that you like Kaewta! Even though she can’t be your confidant in matters beyond her, she can still be there, she can provide warmth. She’s a pure heart, caring, and her IQ is almost border line. No one will be able to tell. If she’s with you, she’ll be able to develop more and more. When her father left, she came to you. You made her want you, knowing full well about her problems. You have to take responsibility for this! Krit: So now this is my responsibility? I’m a normal man, if I’m going to marry, it would be to a normal woman who can understand my needs. Farewell, professor. Tipaya: Wait, Don’t go! Wait! (Desperate) What am I supposed to do with Kaewta? She’ll have to… if you marry her and there are any problems, I’ll take full responsibility! No! Don’t go! I’m going to go to the school’s director, and I’m going to make them deal with you! Krit: Professor, I think it would be wise for you to get real. It’s simply not going to happen. Tipaya: Men like you are dangerous. There are young girls in that school! I’m going to talk to the director! Krit: You won’t need to go through all that trouble. I’ll make it easier for you. I’m going to ask to change departments. There, I hope you’re happy. Kaewta won’t be seeing me again. I can’t spend the rest of my life with someone who is mentally disabled. Krit walks off of the stage. Kaewta slowly slumps onto the piano. She looks down and starts to rock slightly. Kaewta slams both hands onto the keyboard, creating a thunderous, discordant sound. Tipaya runs towards her daughter. Tipaya: (Screaming) Kaewta… The lights start to dim while the sound of the piano stabs through the air. The lights slowly dim entirely. There is a spotlight on Tipaya, we can only see her from her waist up to her head. Tipaya: What am I supposed to do now? No one… no one’s going to help my with Kaewta… Kaewta darling, your horizon doesn’t exist. It’s only an illusion… Tipaya looks up, as if reaching for a distant horizon. Falls to her knees and starts to weep. The crashing sound of the piano reaches a crescendo then faints out entirely. Note by note, a new tune starts to form. Tipaya regains her posture and stands up. A spotlight shines on where Kaewta is playing the piano with her right hand playing inconsistently like a child learning to walk. Tipaya: (Gently speaking whilst slowly stepping towards Kaewta) … an infinite illusion. Lights go out entirely. Kaewta’s song turns into one that echoes hope in the midst of despair.   -